17/09/2026
My youngest daughter turned four on Wednesday. It's been a time of reflection for me, and I wanted to share some of that with you.
Georgie Grace was born at exactly 37 weeks on the 16th September, 2022. I had fallen pregnant when I was 12 months postpartum and I was beside myself. I was terrified to have another baby.
I had to go off my medication, and I had not even recovered from postnatal depression with my first yet. That pregnancy was turbulent, I have cervical incompetence so my body began to evict her at 27 weeks, I spent months in hospital at GCUH, away from my home in Lismore and my eldest, Sarah, and my husband, Jesse. It was horrendous.
At 34 weeks and 4cm dilated, I went into an episode of perinatal psychosis. I began losing my absolute, ever loving sh*t (no better words, honestly) at the obstetricians in Lismore Base in the maternity assessment unit, and told all the women in the MAU that they were going to have their babies k*lled by the obstetricians. I was genuinely terrified and lost total touch with reality. I was put under a 3 day involuntary treatment order and locked in the maternity ward while I was in prodromal labour, an insane amount of pain, and could give birth at any moment.
This is what led to the birth of The Held Project.
All I wanted was for someone to come and bring me a coffee. I was desperate for a barista made coffee after drinking instant on the ward for days. But mostly, I wanted a mum who had been through what I've been through to sit with me, have a coffee with me, and tell me that I'm still a good mum.
I spoke to a social worker, the midwives, a psychiatrist... Nothing felt remotely close to what it would have been like if I had a mum to sit with and chat to.
I pitched the idea to one of my beautiful friends from back home. Visiting mums in the hospital with complex pregnancies and mental health issues with a coffee and a bag of self care, rather than the baby essentials we got in NSW and the lousy bounty bags. Focused on mum. We chatted about how it would work and I put a pin in it for later.
Fast forward to 2025, and I managed to birth The Held Project here in Mackay. We started visiting mums in hospital bringing coffee and nappy bags with lovely things in them - not essentials, just luxe mum goodies. I wanted mum to feel like she was loved. The Held Project just transformed dramatically from there after we received a lovely (not-so-lovely) comment from another charity that apparently delivered nappy bags of essentials to mums in crisis in QLD hospitals - I had never heard of it as I was from NSW. So I redesigned.
Community visits, coffee, personalised totes and luxe goodies. And most importantly, chatting to a mum who had been through it too.
Over the last 12 months and a bit, I've had people jump on board, come and go, mums reach out, sponsorships, you name it. The Held Project has just evolved as I've needed it to, and when we opened The Mum Hub Mackay in April, we stepped up another level.
In the last few months I've taken on homeschooling my girls. It's so nice to be able to have capacity to want to be around them full time after being so miserable about parenting for so long. Thanks to the amazing team I have, I've been able to step right back and be there for my babies when they've needed me. It's why you haven't seen my face much - I've been in mum mode, right where I've wanted to be for almost 6 years since having my first baby, perinatal mental health issues stole my joy for such a long time that I'm only just out of it now. I'm where I wanted to be all along. Present, with my girls.
In this time, the lovely Tiff has stepped up, and her role will soon be expanding to more of a boss babe role. I'm excited for this. It's nice to share success and love mums, especially with one of my best friends.
So now, The Held Project has become huge. We've grown exponentially, helped so many mums, and held many beautiful babies while their mums received the love they needed and drank a hot coffee.
Thank you, mothers of Mackay, for letting me love you for the last 12 months. Thank you for letting my team love you. Thank you for letting us hold you and support you.
This is your reminder that it does get better, that you are loved, that you're never alone, and that you can turn your tragedy into something absolutely beautiful.
Sending love to you ALL today.
🤍 Amanda x