09/22/2026
You know what, I can look back now and see God all through it, I can see the times He held me together, the people He sent, the tiny bits of strength that seemed to come from nowhere, but if I’m being completely honest, I still wish I hadn’t had to go through it.
There, I said it.
I know we’re meant to talk about how the hard things made us stronger, how it all worked together, how we wouldn’t be who we are without it, and yes, I can see some of that now.
But some of it also made me scared, tired, guarded and far too good at expecting the worst.
Some of it hurt me, and I wish it hadn’t.
I don’t think gratitude means we have to lie about what something cost us, or call every painful thing a blessing just because God helped us survive it.
I’m not grateful for what broke my heart, I’m grateful Jesus stayed close while it was breaking.
I’m grateful for every time I thought I couldn’t do another day, and somehow did,every time my prayer was nothing more than, “Jesus, please,” and He understood everything I couldn’t say.
Maybe that’s the difference.
I don’t have to be thankful it happened to be thankful He never left me in it.
So lovely, if you can see God’s hand when you look back, but part of you still aches and thinks, I wish I never had to carry that, you’re not ungrateful, you’re just being honest about how heavy it was. God already knows, He was there.
I hope you feel this today.
“When you pass through the waters, I will be with you.”-Isaiah 43:2
-Little Sparrow Loved
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