10/27/2026
Bullying doesn’t always look like the bullying kids see on TV.
It doesn’t always come from someone your child thinks of as a bully. Sometimes, it happens within their own circle of friends.
It can look like compliments that quietly put them down, embarrassing photos shared as a joke, or teasing that continues after they’ve asked for it to stop. When others brush it off as harmless fun, your child may feel pressure to laugh along rather than risk losing those friendships.
To help your child spot covert bullying, teach them to look for these clues:
· sarcasm that’s meant to wound,
· nonverbal communication that isolates,
· attempts to make the target humiliate themselves,
· an inside joke that has gone too far,
· and the friend(s) responsible pretending the behaviour was innocent.
If your child is the target of covert bullying, make sure you’re having regular emotional check-ins with them. Help them to work through the hurt by being a listening ear and eager cheerleader. Don’t hold back your verbal encouragement, loving affection, and affirmations of your child’s worth – they will need to hear these things from a parent to begin working through the devastation of covert bullying. In addition, discuss with your child the practical steps you, as the parent, will take to stop the mistreatment: alerting the school, helping to seek out new friends, praying for the situation, and keeping an eye on the school’s response.
If you are struggling in this area and need to talk to someone, Focus on the Family Canada’s counsellors offer a free, one-time phone consultation to help you figure out your next steps. They can also refer you to a counsellor in your area. Call 1.800.661.9800 Monday to Friday, 8 a.m. to 4 p.m. Pacific time, to get help.