11/12/2026
When Pastor Appreciation Month Comes and Goes (Without the Appreciation)
by Josh Brake
I’m not one to get excited for Hallmark holidays: Valentine’s Day, Father’s Day, Mother’s Day, Administrative Professionals’ Day, Grandparents’ Day, or Friendship Day (did you know that was a thing?). I don’t really like any of them.
Maybe this makes you think that I’m a grinch who doesn’t like people, but it’s not that. I don’t like these days because the gift giving that almost always accompanies them is not my love language. I find receiving gifts awkward and giving them stressful. It’s not that I don’t value people or have an issue with acknowledging their importance, but when it’s imposed—as with these holidays—it feels a bit contrived, even if the sentiments shared are honest.
So, as a pastor, you can imagine how I feel about not one day, but a whole month of such acknowledgements. October is Pastor Appreciation Month. I don’t know who started it or when, but I’m pretty sure it wasn’t Hallmark. [Editor: I looked it up and it was started by H.B. London at Focus on the Family in 1992—but maybe he was secretly working for Hallmark.]
This is the month where churches are reminded by an email from one of many organizations (or that person who remembers these things) that they are supposed to appreciate their pastors. No pressure, right?
But what I want to consider in this article is what happens inside us, as pastors, when we don’t receive the recognition or appreciation we hope for.
What if No One Says Anything?
What if there’s no applause, no well-intentioned “surprise” card on one of the four or five Sunday mornings in October, or no special prayer thanking God for your role among the people? What if the month comes and goes and no one says anything? And then you hear about your pastor friend whose church showered him with love, appreciation, and gifts.
I imagine the feeling is like that of a mother whose family (i.e. dad) botched Mother’s Day. Maybe they just plain forgot or maybe they couldn’t really be bothered and clearly patched something clunky together at the last minute. We can all imagine the sting of that. And maybe that is what you’re feeling right now if Pastor Appreciation Month came and went without any acknowledgement.
But it’s worth digging a little deeper and asking why we might feel this way.
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