10/12/2026
Something happened Friday night at the park that has been weighing heavily on my mind.
There were several young people there, ranging from children as young as five or six to teenagers and young adults, with very little adult supervision.
At one point, two boys around 8 or 10 years old got into a serious fistfight. They were throwing punches like seasoned fighters, while other kids immediately began yelling, “Fight! Fight! Fight!”
I ran toward them, yelling for them to stop. As I approached, a couple of older kids stepped in and pulled them apart.
When I tried to talk with the boys, they insisted, “We were just playing.” They weren’t, and we all knew it. Even at that age, they seemed to understand the street code well enough not to tell on one another.
I wasn’t interrogating them or looking for blame. I simply offered perspective about why fighting is unacceptable, and how their future will be shaped by the choices they make today. I encouraged them to avoid conflict, learn to walk away, and find better ways to settle disagreements, though they didn’t seem interested in listening.
Because young people often respond better to advice from their peers, I also spoke with the older kids who helped break up the fight. I explained that they have an opportunity and responsibility to set an example, not encourage fighting or stand by watching, but to help younger children learn better ways to avoid and resolve conflict. They seemed receptive, and I truly appreciated that.
Eventually, things settled down, and the boys went their separate ways. But I haven’t stopped thinking about it.
I don’t know these boys or their parents, and I’m not interested in pointing fingers. They may have wonderful parents doing everything they can, or they may come from broken families. It is not for me to judge.
Children are influenced by friends, social media, their neighborhood environments, and many other social factors.
What concerns me is how early violence can become a normal way of handling conflict.
A fistfight at 8 or 10 may not seem like a big deal. Kids have fought for generations. But when fighting is normalized, encouraged by others, and walking away is seen as weakness, attitudes can develop that lead to much more serious consequences.
Violent behavior often escalates very gradually. What starts with fists can eventually become something far more serious, and by then, the consequences may be irreversible.
We talk about gun violence in our community, and we should. But preventing it starts long before someone picks up a gun. It starts with teaching children respect, self-control, accountability, and how to resolve disagreements without violence.
That responsibility begins at home but extends to grandparents, siblings, teachers, coaches, mentors, neighbors, and everyone who has the opportunity to influence young people.
I was encouraged to see older kids eventually step in and do the right thing. They have more influence than they may realize, and we should encourage them to use it for good.
Our work with the Madison County Hand-Up Initiative is not just about responding to violence after it happens. It is about preventing it by reaching young people while we still have the opportunity to make a difference.
We cannot break the cycle of violence if we only respond after someone has been seriously hurt or killed.
We have to teach our children that violence is not the answer, long before the consequences become permanent.
