08/27/2026
Oftentimes when I’m explaining sexual assault to men, I purposely DON’T use a man and a woman as the example. I intentionally use two men as the example. And suddenly there are no technicalities, no debates, no “well what was he doing?” No “why did he go over there?” No “maybe he gave the wrong impression.” 😭
It’s IMMEDIATELY, “OH HELL NO. That’s sick. If another man ever did that to me, I’ma put him in the ground.”
AHHHH. So you DO get it. 😭😭😭
You understand perfectly well that another person does not have the right to sexually violate you just because they wanted access to your body. You understand perfectly well that if you got drunk with your homeboy and, while you were intoxicated/ not conscious enough and vulnerable, he sexually assaulted you, you would NOT be sitting there blaming yourself for drinking with him. You wouldn’t say, “Well, maybe I shouldn’t have gotten that drunk around him.” You’d be looking at HIM like, “Why the F**K would you do that to me?”
And everybody around you would understand EXACTLY why you felt violated, humiliated, traumatized and angry. Nobody would need to investigate whether your sweatpants were too revealing or whether you were “sending signals.” 😭
But the SECOND I change the victim to a woman, everybody suddenly needs a fu***ng congressional hearing to determine whether she somehow contributed to her own assault. Now men AND misogynistic women got 72 follow up questions. 😭
But make the EXACT same scenario two straight men and suddenly everybody understands consent with absolutely NO confusion.
So you get it. GOOD. 😭 Now keep that exact same understanding when the victim is a woman.
(I do not take credit for this writing.)
