Living Systems Counselling

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Living Systems Counselling

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See the Patterns. Shift the System. Supporting individuals, couples, and families at all income levels since 1971.

Move from reacting to responding with clarity, confidence, and care.

10/30/2026

Are they interested? Why haven't they texted back? What did they mean by that comment?

When dating, how much of your attention goes toward figuring out the other person?

What if you take another approach and start focusing on yourself instead? How would you show up differently?

10/27/2026

Have you ever been surprised by how differently you and someone else interpreted the same interaction?

Maybe you felt a connection, but your date didn’t. Or maybe you thought their message was dismissive while they didn’t think anything of it.

As Dr. Murray Bowen points out, two people can have very different perceptions of the same situation, and each may have perfect reasons for seeing it that way.

In a relationship, the goal isn't necessarily to reach a shared interpretation or to stop disagreeing.

What happens when we shift our attention to HOW we respond when our perceptions differ?

Can we stay curious about our own reactions, rather than getting caught up in proving our point or changing the other person’s mind?

10/20/2026

Sometimes, doing things differently feels uncomfortable. But continuing to do things the same way can be just as uncomfortable.

We’re kicking off Season 5 of the Elevator Systems podcast with Dr. Kathleen Smith, exploring what it means to hold on to systems thinking, even when putting it into practice might feel uncomfortable.

https://youtu.be/Q457Fnka_to?si=Rd6mTsc9_rN5DT8Z

10/17/2026

Exploring Everyday Relationships is a brand new three-part series that invites you to reflect on the patterns we carry into our relationships, how we respond to tension, and how familiar dynamics might begin to look different.

Join us for one session that speaks to you, or explore all three as part of a bigger conversation about the relationships in your life.

https://livingsystems.ca/training/exploring-birth-order-triangles-and-everyday-relationships/

10/15/2026

“People separate because they can’t separate.” — Edwin Friedman

Have you ever noticed how the harder we try to get someone to understand us, agree with us, or do things our way, the more distance can grow between us?

Sometimes, we begin to pull away from the people we love because it becomes increasingly difficult to tolerate our differences and disagreements.

Perhaps one of the ongoing challenges in our relationships is learning how to stay connected to those we love without needing to be the same.

10/09/2026

Supporting others through deeply difficult circumstances asks a lot of us.

What helps sustain us so we can continue to be a resource for others?

In Katherine's work in the field of family violence, she reflects on how Bowen Theory invites professionals to pay attention not only to the challenges faced by those they support, but also to their own functioning.

Our Thinking BIG about Family Challenges conference is happening in two weeks - don't miss out!

10/06/2026

“Do as I do, or I’ll do as you do.”

Kathleen Smith, PhD, LPC offers a simple way to describe togetherness in Bowen theory.

Sometimes, we adjust ourselves to match others. Other times, we expect others to adjust to us. There is often pressure to agree with others in relationships and it can be difficult to hold on to our own thinking.

How often do you find yourself going along with others just to keep the peace?

10/02/2026

Does Bowen theory think togetherness is a bad thing?

Not at all.

Connection and togetherness are an important part of relationships. The question is whether we can freely choose them or whether we get automatically pulled into them.

We can choose to spend time with family, support someone we love, or compromise, while still taking responsibility for that choice.

But if we say yes while feeling resentful, angry, or anxious because we feel like we have no choice, that's when it becomes a problem.

09/30/2026

Sometimes it can be hard to know how much to worry about the world our children are growing up in.

Economic uncertainty, social and political change, and an increasingly unpredictable world can create anxiety for both parents and young adults.

At our October conference, Thinking Big About Family Challenges, Annie will explore how societal anxiety can shape the experiences of young adults and their families, and what it can look like to respond with greater awareness and agency.

Her presentation, “The Anxious Field: Therapist Self-Awareness and Client Agency,” brings a Bowen family systems perspective to these questions.

We’re excited to have Annie join us for this conversation!

https://livingsystems.ca/conference/thinking-big-about-family-challenges/

09/26/2026

How does one find the right balance when it comes to parenting?

You can listen to Lauren Errington in one of our S3 podcast episodes where she shares her thinking on this wonderful topic of parenting.

Address

901 3rd Street West
North Vancouver, BC
V7P3P9

Telephone

+16049265496

Website

https://livingsystems.ca/

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