09/07/2026
According to a psychologist, building and maintaining friendship is an important pillar of our health. Sure, there’s water, food and shelter, but relationships and companionship come in pretty close after that.
And friendship offers some impressive health benefits, like low blood pressure, less stress, less risk of obesity, lower levels of depression and it can even prolong your life span and lower your risk for certain dementias.
But where and how do you actually make new friends as an adult?
-Shared interest is huge. You bond with people who like the same things as you or who are going through similar things. If you like biking, find a biking group. If you like running, find a running buddy. Join a book club, go to a musician group, get involved with church or attend a mom meet-up.
-Don’t be too aggressive. When you’re 6-years-old everyone is a potential friend. Then you grow up and start to see that not everyone has your best interest at heart. People can get suspicious if you come off too strong when you first meet. Instead, try easing into the friendship and making sure you’re both comfortable.
-Be an exceptional listener and show interest. Most people feel awkward when they meet someone for the first time, but if you’re a good listener and ask the right questions, feeling uncomfortable is unnecessary.
-Celebrate. When you first meet someone, inquire about something good that happened to them.
-Consider location. Friendship can take time to develop, but the more often you see someone or hang out, the quicker the relationship tends to form.
-Evaluate your circle. You’re going to have varying levels of closeness in your circle. Active check-ins depend on the nature of the person and the friendship you have with them.
-Explore old friendships. If you’re at the point in your life where you’re actively looking for friendship, one of the best ways to connect with someone is through old friendship.
Overtime you’ll start to build confidence by putting yourself out there. As you get more comfortable using these strategies, start to use it in areas you are more frequently.