04/02/2024
Know your role!
Carrie and I have had this particular discussion many times. We’ve literally had 3-4 hour conversations at a time about many, many topics involving our relationship. And, we’ve had discussions at this length 100’s of times about different things. (Not kidding)
Do we know our roles?
What exactly are our roles?
What and where are our roles ingrained into?
Here’s what I’ll share that I’ve learned of my own role for the men here…
(Ladies feel free to read and chime in)
Society has lied to you, to all of us. It’ll have you thinking that we no longer need traditional male and female roles. That the nuclear family unit has to evolve and change to survive. That’s a lie.
In fact, you should do the opposite. Because of the progressive world society is changing into, you should DOUBLE DOWN on your roles. EARN your roles. As man and woman at the head of this powerhouse.
Fellas, here’s where it gets real. For this to actually take place and for someone in the relationship to drive the car. YOU have to lead. No matter where you are, how hard it will be, the changes in the relationship that HAS to happen… it’s on you as a man. Men LEAD.
I’ll break this down for you.
1. Men should lead the relationship, life. That’s doesn’t mean you dominate the relationship and it doesn’t mean your partner doesn’t have a voice, opinion or guidance for you. In fact, that should be your first resource for making a move as a team.
2. Submit to God. Let go of your our Will and ask for the Will of God. Let only Gods will be done. It will lead you into your best life for you and your partner.
3. Submit to your partner. This doesn’t make you weak. This doesn’t mean she wears the pants. Or that you give up your power. Submitting to your partner allows her to submit to you. You lead, be the example, she will follow. By both of you submitting you can begin to lay out your stepping stones for your future as equals. TOGETHER.
4. The agreement! In order for all the things in life that comes your way to be dealt with, you have to both agree to “no matter what, I won’t run away”. By doing this, you can actually tell each other the truth. Everything. If you think for any reason you can’t tell your partner the truth because they might run away, you won’t be truthful.
5. Always tell the truth. ALL OF IT. Even if your voice squeaks, say it anyway!
6. Show yourself! Be open, vulnerable and show your emotions to her. Tell her what you are thinking and feeling. Expressing to her what you’re feeling will connect with her on a deep level. It her language. Laugh with her, dance with her, look right into her eyes, be present with her.
7. The vision! Who are you and where are you going. As a man leading, you might know where you are going, how you’re going to do it and what the end goal is but you have to constantly share that map with your partner. She has to see where you’re going so she can be a great helper. Without her having access to the map, she will feel disconnected and lost. Give her the map!
8. Walk with the Lion. You may very well be a lion and you can hunt and roar all you want around men but not with your woman. Be gentle. You need to be the tamed lion. The one she unleashes on the world. You’re the weapon and she’s the holster. Become the man that protects and gives security. Physically and financially. Earn it!
9. Never silence each other. You should both be seen and heard. No matter how much time it takes to put each other in the other persons shoes, DO IT. This level of communication will turn any situation you have into a smile in the end.
10. Always keep you and your partners needs above all other people. Your bond and commitment is the stronghold of everyone around you.
These 10 stepping stones are key to what Carrie and I are building. Neither person can break these stones or the building will fall.
Men, go f’ing lead!
I don’t care if you just starting dating, been dating for months or years or you’re married. This right here is what men should be doing to create a solid family from the ground up!
If you aren’t doing this, GO!
LEAD
COMMIT
BUILD
God is Great!
Jesus is King! 👑
