06/11/2026
The pain point to change is not the place to start.
When faced with a threshold in our lives, some change that we have chosen or has chosen us, we think it’s wise and courageous to face it down—to go into the struggle and FIGURE IT OUT.
It’s true that the gift is in the wound. The ancients remind us that the path to the light is through the darkness. The ancients also remind us that there is a larger path to your life—a Gifted path that is yours to walk. We call it your Core Gift.
At the threshold, always think first of the larger path to your life. It won’t seem like the right thing to do. It requires a slowing down. It can feel like avoidance. Or denying the inevitable. Or too theoretical or philosophical. Every bone in your being wants to get into it and solve what’s at hand. Get rid of the pain.
But don’t forget: remembering your Gifted path is your basic orientation to YOU. Remembering it is both a comforting North Star and a magnetic reminder of how to orient yourself to the threshold you are at in this current story of your life.
Your Core Gift is the lense into how to both view the threshold and work with the change at hand. To not use your natural and Gifted capacity at moments of change is to invite trouble into your life. Diversion from your Gifted path will lead you to unnecessary suffering from trying to move forward with solutions that are not part of the true you.
So do this: If your Core Gift is about seeing structure and order, go into a threshold with that lense. It’s your natural way into opportunity-finding. The person in the boat may ask themselves questions about how the boat was working or how far away land is. If your Core Gift is about discerning truth, you go into a threshold eagerly pursuing truth. The person in the boat may ask themselves if they are in any danger of sinking or hypothermia, or why the decision was made to go on this row. Different portals into the threshold.
If your Core Gift is about discerning truth, and you going into a threshold focused on the structure and order of things, even though it seems like the obvious thing to do, you will find yourself disoriented and uncertain. Your psyche will be sending you messages that this is not the way forward for you. Your imagination will be restricted, and your decisions will be tentative. If you are listening, you will get many messages that things are not going like they should at this threshold.
Yes, considering structure and order may eventually be part of what you consider in this moment of change, but it’s not the first consideration. The first thing to do is get on the path that is yours to walk, discerning truth, and to trust that your Gift will get you there. Over and over again. To not have faith in your Gifted path is often the first indication you are experiencing the confusion of self-forgetting.
When you follow your gifted path, the pain-point will have been useful and you will, once again, see further down your path to the next crown of the hill or dip in the path to the next threshold.
We are gathering a small cohort in July to reflect on the modern and ancient roots of Core Gifts and learn the Core Gift Discovery conversational process. If you are at a threshold, or you are a coach, change-maker, therapist, community organizer or any of the other labels for people with gifts for change, come join us.
Want to build a culture of gifts in your group? There is a 50% discount for three or more.
It’s here: https://www.coregift.org/master-facilitator-certification-program