08/14/2026
This week, our Humans of Beacon series features Ted Lawson. See what he has to say about volunteering at Beacon:
I was asked to share why I volunteer. The short answer is, Tuli said I had to.
The more interesting answer is that one night, when putting my then 3-year-old through his bedtime routine, I was broaching the subject of body safety and who is allowed to see or touch your body. I felt awkward and ill-prepared - scared I would muck it up, and generate unwarranted fear or shame in my amazing, innocent son.
I found myself praying for guidance about it as I lay in bed that night. I remember this clearly because: 1) I don’t often do the formal prayer thing; and 2) because I was especially awkward about it. I mean, even for a UU prayer, this thing was all over the place. I was all, “Okay, Dear God or Divine Order, please help me not mess this up. It’s really important, and really tricky, and I just want to do right by him here.”
The next morning, I found an email from Dr. Tuli Patel tactfully saying, "You know, parents who have kids in the youth program usually volunteer in the program. But actually, instead, I think you should volunteer as an OWL facilitator to young kids.” I looked it up and saw that the OWL (Our Whole Lives) youth program is a “secular, comprehensive s*xuality education and personal safety curriculum….”
Did Tuli Patel answer my prayer? Is Tuli the Divine Order??
So, soon I, and my husband, both did the young OWL facilitator training (which was a lot more in-depth and a lot more inspiring than I expected). And the last few years I have been co-facilitating 5th grade OWL with the phenomenal Allyson Murphy.
Anyone want to share what comes to mind when you hear "S*x Ed class?" No? Yehhh, I didn’t think so.
Well, the 5th grade curriculum does cover good ol’ anatomy and contraception. But it is not "s*x ed" because it also explores the intersections of s*xuality with values, relationships, identity, body image, and cultural influences. Heady stuff. And extremely relevant for these kids' daily lives.
My two favorite things that OWL imparts are: Personal Agency; and Deeper Communication with their parents. Kids leave the OWL program:
- Knowing that they have the right to ask questions
- With a better sense when respect is present - or lacking- in a relationship
- And better equipped to talk to their adults about tricky or heavy situations – instead of to the internet or an AI platform.
They need these things now more than ever. Because the world is coming at them ...quickly. For example, the average age children are exposed to explicit po*******hy online is now between 7 and 12 years old. Importantly, over half of these kids find it accidentally. But it's not just images - our kids are being barraged with information and opinions on serious things. So, it is vital that they get to build their own framework - to assess and slot these things into. And to have open communication with their adults, where they can process tricky things.
I have learned so much in OWL. From the training, from Allyson, but mostly from the kids. Every year, the kids teach me about the world we, and especially they, now live in. One way they do this is through the Question Box. Each week, the kids anonymously submit questions about whatever they want. Allyson and I have to show up the next week with answers. And great group conversations happen from there.
Allow me to share with you some questions submitted over the last several years. These are some of the more bland ones - as to be appropriate for this setting. Though there may still be some good conversations triggered for your car ride home.
When you listen to these questions, I invite you to think what it would be like to not know the answer, and to not have a trusted place to ask it. For the parents of young kids here, think about how you would answer these questions:
- I was peer-pressured into asking my crush if they liked me. Their answer was no. So what should I do now?
- Is it okay to have an app that is my AI relationship app?
- Which gender does HIV go to?
- What is the good thing about s*x that people like? It all sounds terrible.
- Why do people think gay people are bad?
- Why are women treated the way they are vs. the way boys are?
- What if you don't want someone to keep touching you, but they won't listen?
- Why does the boy have to hit or be rough to the girl for it to be good?
- What if someone sends a n**e photo and the person that received it says they have to send more or else they’ll show everyone the photo? What should you do?
- Did Coco Chanel invent skin cancer?
I am so grateful to Tuli, Jamaine, Jé, Kirsten deFur, the other OWL volunteers, and all of you for making OWL possible, for creating a place where kids can safely ask questions like these. I know that my life would have been much improved if I had had such a place. I want my kids to have such a place. So that is why I volunteer.
