12/04/2024
On Monday, this guy let his anxiety get the better of him.
He's always had anxiety and we've worked his whole life on mediating it and finding solutions to keep him safe and happy. On Monday, he ate a rubber door mat. Not just shredded, he ate the pieces.
It's frustrating to come home from work and see things shredded up. It's hard to shoulder some of the blame. Shouldn't he know better by now?
He spent Monday night sick. He was lethargic and grumpy, his third eyelids were up, he was vomiting chunks of rubber. He was miserable. I was so worried. I held him and watched him closely. He isn't that young, bounce back from anything dog he was 5 years ago. Things hurt him a little more now. He is slowing down.
It sucks to watch them age. Especially if they take a step back in some of the work we've done over the last decade to overcome his insecurities. But it's a good reminder. It pushes me to take an extra 5 minutes to pick things up that he could get into. It reminds me to spend more time being patient with him and assessing his routine. I have hard weeks too, and he's helped me through them. He deserves the same from me.
Our future time together is now less than the time we've spent together so far. Boy does that sit heavy on my heart lately. I need to slow down and listen to him and his needs. Just like I am only human, he is only dog. He is not perfect and I need to remember not to hold him to a standard of perfection.
He is a good boy, the best actually. He handles so much turmoil with grace even when it's hard for him and he feels left out. A rubber door mat isn't going to break us down. We'll just add and extra few minutes of snuggles every day from here on out.
One day, I'll miss picking up shredded cardboard or bath mats. Some day, I'd give anything to clean up a puddle of spite p*e behind the front door. Until then, we'll stay patient and love that sweet gray face. ❤️