Cathy and Dave's Adoption Journey

05/27/2026

Dave sez,

What caught my attention was that Natalia Grace was from Ukraine.

I just finished watching all three seasons, sixteen episodes of "The Curious Case of Natalia Grace". It's not for the squeamish. Viewer Discretion *IS* advised.

Natalia is not only a "special needs" child from Ukraine, but she suffers from a form of dwarfism. Her origins in Ukraine are really only a small part of her story. The majority of her story is what happens here in America, with the Ciccone family, the Barnett family, the Mans family and ultimately, the DePaul family. It is a roller coaster ride.

It's unfortunate that the Ciccone family chose not to continue with Natalia as family. Not only was she rejected and abandoned by her birth mother in Ukraine because of her condition, in turn, she was rejected by her first American family.

The story in Season One is primarily regarding her time with the Barnett family. What happened there is horrific. Worse, there's no real way to verify anyone's story. There are no nannie-cams or security cameras in the house. Michael Barnett is either at work, or in another room. It comes down to Michael Barnett's word versus Kristine Barnett and Natalia Grace's childhood memories.

The take-away from Season One is that Natalia Grace should never have been with the Barnetts - and possibly never have been with the Ciccones.

Season Two is Natalia Grace's side of the story. The take-away there is Michael Barnett seems to not want to say or admit to anything that could come back around in a possible future civil suit by Natalia Grace. So, there's really no answers to Natalia's questions. Season Two ends with the shocking reveal that the relationship Natalia Grace has with the Mans family is breaking down.

Season Three opens with Natalia Grace being rescued from the Mans by the Depaul family. She's spirited away from Nashville, TN to New York. What unravels is alleged abuse, manipulation and control.

At the conclusion of four Season Three episodes, Natalia Grace may reach independence after a very long roller coaster ride.

It's a sad story. An embarrassing story. It's an attempt to flip the usual narrative of a family trying to deal with a "special needs" child. Typically, "special needs" children are filled with anger. They are angry over being rejected and abandoned by birth parents. There is pain; anger and fear at being an orphan in a "system". There's no stability. There's no structure. When a "special needs" child is placed with an adoptive family, it's just another disruption.

It takes a very strong family, a family that is self-lessly committed to this "special needs" individual to help them.

The takeaway for viewers of the documentary is that NONE of the families that Natalia Grace was with prior to the DePaul family in 2025(!) focused on HER needs.

That's the tragedy of her story. And then, to see it all unfolding and unravelling through cameras for all the world to see.

Prayerfully and hopefully, Natalia Grace's life will quiet down to peace and joy.

05/20/2026

Maybe a little late to the party...
Started watching this the other day. Mid-way through Season Two, Natalia Speaks...

Cathy and I adopted three children from a private orphanage in Novisilky, a small town just outside Kiev, Ukraine.

The biggest hardship of a "special needs" orphan is abandonment - rejection.

Natalia Grace was abandoned by her birth mother due to her condition.

She was later abandoned by Gary and Dyan Ciccone in New Hampshire.

The documentary focuses primarily on Natalia Grace's time with the Barnett family in Indiana. It's shocking. It's sensational. It's tragic. It's everything that has made up shows like Geraldo, Maury Povich and to a certain degree Dr. Phil. I would describe it as "gaper's block television".

Right now, it may ring hollow and seem small consolation, but there is a day coming when this kind of pain and tears will be wiped away.

05/04/2026

Make of this what you will...

George Lucas is an adoptive parent. The story of Star Wars has some adoption elements to it.

Of course, you can also argue that Luke Skywalker is much like Peter Parker. His birth parents gone, along with his both his aunt and uncle. He's taught power and responsibility by old Ben...

04/26/2026

"...One must enter into freedom through pain... On the trip were two invisible companions: truth and suffering."

Adoption is about blending and grafting toward healing a deep wound. It is not for the squeamish, or faint of heart.

Prayerfully, hopefully, joy will rise like a phoenix from the ashes of sorrow.

If you want a better understanding of identity, acceptance, fitting-in and brokenness, this book is for you.

04/26/2026

Dave sez,

So, I'm reading Sherri Eldridge's "Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew".

The chapter I just finished is about acknowledging and celebrating differences. Differences in the adoptive child that come from birth parents. Sherri has a parable that involves creating a braid of purple, green and red ribbons.

The Purple represents the Birth Parents. Green represents the Adoptive Parents. Red, the Adopted Child. Woven together, to create the identity...

01/20/2026

George Burns was born on this date in 1896. He lived to be 100 years old. Of his many accomplishments, he and wife, Gracie Allen, were adoptive parents. They adopted a daughter and a son.

01/19/2026

01/01/2026

January 1.
Global Family Day!

12/29/2025

We found a LOT of books on adoption. This is one of them. I'm making time to read - and highlight as I go.

12/28/2025

Dave sez,

It was this time of the year... 2010. The week between Christmas and New Years.

Cathy and I had been trying to have biological children for fourteen years. When we first said, "I do" in May of 1990, Cathy said, "Get crackin', Mister!" She really thought it was a GOOD idea to populate the world with smaller versions of ourselves.

Fourteen years. Life happens. In the summer of 2004, she looked into a fertility program. In August 2004, on a Wednesday, we got the diagnosis. Cathy had cancer. Surgery was scheduled for two days later, Friday. She came out of surgery determined to adopt.

Our first program was an independent adoption. We were one of (50) fifty. In a "D"-ring binder. The average wait time was between eighteen months and four years. It all hinged on "Birth Mom".

Our next program was China, then Vietnam. When Vietnam stopped international adoptions with the United States, we got our dossier returned to us in time for Thanksgiving. In Vietnamese. So we went domestic. The economy tanked. There were fewer and fewer Birth Moms.

By October 2010, we were not in any program. Cathy wanted a break. So, we took the Holidays of 2010 to regroup.

We were sitting in the living room on the couch together one night between Christmas and New Years 2010. Not in any program. We'd reached a point that we were without Hope.

Was the answer "No"? Sometimes it is. What Cathy wanted more than anything was not possible naturally, biologically.

So, we're sitting there. And I'm wondering if people still make New Years' resolutions. In broadcasting, I had gotten to see Fun Fact statistics that a New Years' resolution only lasts like maybe a week or two into the new year.

It was like scribbling on a scrap of paper, putting that paper in a bottle, corking it and tossing it into the sea of social media.

"I want to be a dad in 2011."

As Ace Ventura would say, "Allllllllllll-righty, then!"

I'm not sure we actually felt heaven and earth move, but stopping to consider everything and everyone that moved quickly in just a couple or few days... Maybe it was like the conclusion of "It's a Wonderful Life"..."Please, God, I want to live again."

"There's this boy."

There just happened to be a group of children from Ukraine visiting to experience the holidays in "The Land of the Free and The Home of the Brave". It just so happened that a friend was visiting family hosting on of the children. When the music stopped, there was one boy left standing without a chair. Our friend said, "Cathy and Dave would be perfect parents." It just so happened that I had rolled a week of vacation over to the first week of January. I was just going to kick around the house.

There was a letter of recommendation. Arrangements were quickly made. Doubts and weights were laid aside for the race that was to come.

On January 3rd, 2011, I was introduced as "Papa Dave." I met our first child.

It was a long, winding and rocky road.

A road less traveled by.