10/23/2024
I saw a post from somebody about to end things 2 nights ago that really hit me. They were asking random internet strangers for a sliver of hope, because they were scared and didn't actually want to, they just felt they had no other choice. I took my time to write out this response, and it ended up being something I really needed to hear for myself. I'd like to share this with you, in part because it might be helpful to somebody struggling out there, but also for posterity. My own words to somebody else were somehow the same thing I needed to hear for myself a the time. I'd like to be reminded of this in the future.
"Bro, do not take a drastic permanent measure for a problem that is not permanent. I can't tell you any magic words to make you feel better right now. I am sure the torment you feel is hard for most people to grasp. It sounds like you are in your own personal Hell. During your journey here in this lifetime, if you find yourself in Hell, don't stop there. Keep moving. Reevaluate this decision when you are in a different place. As dark as it feels right now, this feeling is not permanent. Your position in life is not permanent. Ending it is.
Walk to a tranquil place. Literally, put your shoes on right now and go walk. Take a bottle of water with you if you can. Walk, drink water, maybe even have a snack, something you really like. Try to tune in to the beauty around you. If the air smells good, breath it deeply. If a tree looks interesting, look and look and look at it. Try to find the beauty. It's everywhere.
Try to connect with a different energy, a different wavelength right now. Even for a second. Move your brain off this loop if even for a second. When your brain goes dark again, which it probably will within a few seconds of replacing the dark thought.... do it again. Move your brain of that spot again. Do it again. And again and again. Visualize a dream, a puppy, a friend, a future wife, a future kid, anything/anyone whose existence in your future life would be worth living for. You have some wonderful things coming in your future if you just white knuckle through this right now. Don't let the negative energies win. YOU can be a conduit for greatness. You CAN attract deep and meaningful love. You just can't do it while you are in Hell. So move man. Get the Hell out of Hell first, then reconsider if you want to end it. But only once you are sure you have walked far enough that you are no longer in Hell.
This could be your rock bottom you bounce off of. But you'll never know if you stop before your time is up."
