04/08/2026
When we lost our daughter, sister, mother, spouse, aunt, friend, and battle buddy, I, like everyone else, had a choice in how to deal with the most unimaginably loss. I easily could of died of a broken and shattered heart, but knowing the ways Jennifer handled her many life challenges and her talks with me of “if anything happened while she was deployed”, I chose to found the non-profit “Surviving Families of Fallen Warriors” to Honor and Remember not only what she chose to embody as a military member, but all those who have done so throughout our history. Our first project was creating a Wall of Honor at the Army Reserve Building on Dyess Air Force Base recognizing Fallen Warriors from all military branches. This first endeavor also led to working with some of the most amazing and dedicated military members. Below are remarks I made that day:
"Wall of Honor Dedication Remarks, 3 December 2016
Taking an accelerated journey through history, my father was a Navy master diver and gone much of my high school years with deployments to Vietnam. In that era military members were not well respected which spilled over in our high school where the military kids formed a tight group to protect ourselves from the negative comments about those who joined the military and those whose parents were serving in Vietnam. It didn’t help that I had this feeling of abandonment that my dad sometimes volunteered to go. It wasn’t until his retirement ceremony when people begin to speak of his service in Vietnam, losing team members on his dive team while defusing mines, and the many ships and people whose lives he saved that I first encountered what duty and sacrifice truly meant—my dad was not choosing to be away from us, he was using his skill-set to get his fellow service members home safely.
Forwarding to Naples, Italy where my husband was stationed, my children had machine-guns posted on the roof of their school, school buses checked for bombs, and families given the opportunity to return to the states because “The Mother of All Wars” was imminent. We lived in an Italian village and when my husband was summoned, he reported for duty and for the next 5 days, with no phone or television, my children and I waited and wondered what was happening in the world.
And September 11th, when watching the morning news, I saw a plane fly into a building. When the second plane hit, I immediately called my daughter, stationed at Ft. Sill, and told her America was under attack and wasn’t sure how widespread it was so please be careful and watch your surroundings. Her response was, “Sure mom, okay”. Her call came a short time later, “Mom, they hit the Pentagon, the Army side.” And then a confession, “Mom, you know I love the boys with all my heart, but right now if they sent me, I’d go to the Pentagon, those are my people.” And then, “Remember in Naples when dad left, I felt like he abandoned us, but now I understand why he left.” You see, it’s not about politics or anything else, it’s about their team, unit, squad, whatever term you choose to identify a group of military warriors. It is truly inexpressible to capture the willingness of military members to give their all for each other and to understand the deeper sacredness of who they are for each other. They are called upon to reach their highest levels of performance in the sky, on the ground, and on the water in situations that most people could not imagine. They possess an inner strength to face fear and adversity with courage, a mental toughness to overcome obstacles and challenges with a calculated self-confidence and a stoic tactical awareness to see their duty completed, regardless of the cost. They do it for their families, and only hope their families understand and have their back, even as they have each other’s back.
Our daughter told us in a hundred different ways after she came back from her deployments in Iraq why she did what she did, “Glad my boys can grow up free”, “Mom, the atrocities against women, I never want that for you”. This wall is not just holding up this building, it is holding up the values and principles of this nation, freedom, bravery, valor, justice, honor, love of family. John Levitow, the lowest ranking and youngest airman in history to receive the Congressional Medal of Honor, was severely injured with more than 40 shrapnel wounds when his aircraft was hit over the skies in Vietnam, yet he saved the lives of his 8 crewmembers and stated he was just doing his duty.
For Army Sgt. Salvatore Giunta’s service in Afghanistan, he became the first living person since Vietnam to receive the Congressional Medal of Honor for saving members of his patrol in an ambush in an area nicknamed the Valley of Death. Salvatore too was uncomfortable being singled out. “If I’m a hero, every person that stands around me, everyone who goes into the unknown is a hero. I did what I did because in the scheme of painting the picture of that ambush, that was just my brush stroke. I didn’t make the biggest brush stroke, and it wasn’t the most important brush stroke”.
To all the surviving families here I would say our loved ones, like John and Salvatore, would shy away from being labeled as anything other than doing their duty in the service of their country, but they still have a service to perform; if we forget their story, everyone else will, and shame on us.
This wall permeates, not with pictures of those no longer with us, but life lessons that radiate from each smile, each set of eyes, each uniform represented, each of their “brush strokes” creating a place for reflection and gratitude. Quiet heroism knows neither age nor gender nor rank nor position but is a selfless action and courageous movement of the heart. Those who have held nothing back in the moment when their oath to duty becomes their only reality stands as a standard of valor for individual sacrifice and service to something greater than themselves.
May God bless our military men and women currently serving. May He bless all those who served in the past; for those here who served in Vietnam, welcome home! And may he continue to bless our future military with men and women of character and integrity…
At the Wall of Honor before Unveiling:
To the members of the Company Grade Officers Club and Marine Detachment 1—you have remained faithful and devoted to this endeavor and never faltered regardless of the many obstacles and challenges over the last year and a half.
To my husband—for your great love for our daughter and in support for the endless, “Craig, can you…”
To all survivors—I am stronger in your presence…"
