Am I The A’hole?

Am I The A’hole? you're the as***le

06/14/2026

AITAH for kicking my sister my MOH out of my wedding?
36 bride here! Getting married 11/08/26

My sister has been my only stress on the wedding. My sister is very odd and we are not much alike and she has my niece who is 21 that I made a bridesmaid as well. My sister has a very strange obsession like helicopter grandma over my 2 year old great nephew.

First problem the dress choice! My sister is a bigger woman and wanted to pick a sexy lingerie looking dress and I said absolutely not! It looks like a sexy nighty you would wear to bed with tied up spaghetti straps. With her being plus size I knew the dress would be a disaster waiting to happen!

Next, She is also making my wedding all about her grandson like we all have to worry about him, make sure he gets his nap in or snack before the ceremony starts. Then had also requested to use our wedding photographer to take pictures of him. So the day of the wedding I will point my sister out to the photographer and tell her do not listen to whatever my sister asks you to do.

Then she goes behind my FH and I back inviting people we don’t know so they can cater to my sister, and great nephew. We are fine with plus ones like your spouse, but you cannot not bring baby sitters to a wedding! So glad we found out early since these strangers would have no food and no place to sit 🤦‍♀️ like who does that?

Also now my little niece is pregnant again! And will be 6 months at the wedding, so praying my sister doesn’t request the photographer to do maternity pictures at our wedding since my niece will be dressed up.

so I kicked my sister off the wedding party so she can sit and watch her grandson. I don’t understand why 3 adults my sister, niece and sister husband cannot watch 1 child. They are traveling and have to bring him. I know it means more to my niece being a bridesmaid. I got it worked out with my mom, and my sister is fine with it and I will still include my sister in everything. She will just not be a bridesmaid anymore and be apart of the ceremony.

However I am truly nervous because we will have a videographer recording the wedding, so praying my sister doesn’t make a scene with her grandson. Also nervous my sister said she wants to give a speech and my FH husband thinks it will be a scene from the movie the hang over. Lord help me!

It’s been a couple days and now everything has calmed down. Did I do the right thing in this situation?

Thank you!

06/14/2026

AITH for telling my aunt the real reason everyone keeps skipping her holiday dinners
So some background. My aunt hosts Thanksgiving every year and every year it is the same thing. She is incredibly controlling about everything, criticizes everyone's cooking if they bring a dish, makes passive aggressive comments about weight and life choices, and then acts like she is the perfect host who does everything for the family. For the past three years, cousins have been quietly making excuses. "We have other plans," "the kids are sick," "we are doing something small this year." She had always complain to my mom that nobody appreciates her and the family is falling apart.

Last week she called me crying saying she feels like people are avoiding her and she does not know why. I debated just comforting her but honestly I felt like she deserved to know the truth. So I told her. Not mean about it, but I laid it out. That people feel judged when they come, that the comments about weight and parenting choices make everyone uncomfortable, and that if she wants people around she needs to stop treating every gathering like she's the only one doing it right. She hung up on me. My mom is now saying I was cruel and should have just let it go. Half the family is texting me saying I went too far and she's been crying for days. But like, she asked. She said she wanted to know why. I told her the truth because I thought it would actually help her.

AITH?

06/13/2026

AITH for not caring about having a relationship with my sister’s baby?
I (24F) am the youngest of five siblings. My older siblings are Mia (32F), Tyler (30M), Ethan (28M), and Ryan (26M). I've always been very close with my brothers, but my relationship with Mia has never been good.

For as long as I can remember, she acted like having a younger sister was some kind of punishment. She got along great with our brothers but wanted nothing to do with me. If we played games as kids, she'd avoid being on my team. If we went out as a family, she'd walk with everyone except me. Even when we got older she barely acknowledged me unless she absolutely had to.

My parents tried everything. They talked to her, sent her to counseling for a while, and constantly reminded her that she didn't have to be my best friend but she did have to treat me with basic kindness. Nothing ever changed.

What hurt most was that she would go out of her way for everyone else. She remembered all my brothers' birthdays, called them regularly, and bought them gifts when she traveled. Meanwhile she'd forget my birthday every year and never once brought me anything. When I was in high school and struggling with bullying, she seemed more interested in comparing us than supporting me.

As adults things never improved. She invited all of our siblings to different events over the years but usually left me out. The biggest example was her wedding. Every sibling was involved except me. I wasn't invited until other family members started questioning it, and by that point I didn't even want to go.

Now she's pregnant with her first child and due in a few weeks. There was a baby shower recently and I didn't attend or send a gift. My parents found out and told me this could be an opportunity to repair things and be involved in my future niece or nephew's life.

The problem is I don't really want to.

I don't hate the baby obviously, but I don't see why I should force a relationship with a child whose mother has spent over twenty years making it clear she doesn't want a relationship with me. My parents keep saying becoming a mother might change her and help her mature, but I've heard versions of that for years whenever she hit a new life milestone.

At this point I feel like I'm the only person expected to make an effort, and I'm tired of trying.

AITH?

06/13/2026

AITH for breaking my family apart after exposing my boyfriend and younger sister?
I (20F) was with my boyfriend (21M) for about a year when I found out he had been secretly involved with my 18 year old sister. I didn’t hear it directly from them, I actually overheard them talking on the phone and she was panicking while he was basically telling her not to worry about me finding out. I didn’t confront them right away because I was honestly in shock, but a few days later we were all at a family dinner and I ended up bringing it up in front of everyone because I couldn’t hold it in anymore. My boyfriend left immediately and my sister broke down crying and kept begging me not to cut her off, saying she made a mistake and that she wanted things to go back to normal. The problem is she had been staying with me and we were supposed to move into a new place together soon, but after this I told her that wasn’t happening and I’ve been staying at a friend’s since. Now she can’t afford to live there on her own and I’ve made it clear I won’t be living with her again or continuing a relationship with either of them. My family is split, with some saying I embarrassed her and made things worse, and others saying I was blindsided and reacted out of shock. One of my aunts even said I ruined her life, but I told her I’m not responsible for the fallout of what they did. Now I’m being called dramatic and heartless, but I genuinely don’t know if I went too far. AITAH?

06/11/2026

AITA For not paying half my bf's bills? 26F & 30M.
I (26F) have been with my boyfriend (30M) for two years. When we got together, he was struggling after his father's death. His family relationships were deteriorating, there was conflict over the estate and 80-acre family farm he inherited, and he felt overwhelmed and alone. He told me to move in because he needed support. I did. At no point were bills, rent, or financial expectations discussed. He says now that "I should have known" he wanted me to pay half the bills.

The current conflict is that he believes I am not supporting him because I do not pay half the household bills. He says contributing financially would prove I am "invested" in the relationship and that because I financially support my mother and brother, I have an "out" if the relationship fails.

The reason I cannot pay half the bills is because I am already carrying significant financial obligations. I pay two mortgages, which consume about 75% of my income. I pay my mother's electric, internet, cellphone, and groceries, and I pay half of my autistic, schizophrenic brother's utilities and internet. I also cover my own expenses, including gas, groceries, pets, and personal necessities. In January 2026, I cut $100 from my own food budget to give my boyfriend toward the electric bill because he repeatedly complained that I was not contributing.

While I am not contributing financially the way he wants, I do essentially all of the household work: laundry, dishes, bathrooms, trash, cleaning, grocery shopping, and meal preparation. I work 7 a.m. to 5 p.m. Monday through Thursday with a 90-minute commute each way, making my workdays over 13 hours long. I also care for my own animals and regularly help him with his cattle, goats, and outdoor projects.

None of my family obligations were ever hidden from him. Before we were officially dating, before we lived together, and before we made long-term plans, I told him I was financially supporting my mother and brother due to my mother's car accident and ongoing struggles. I have text messages showing these conversations happened. He knew my situation before asking me to move in. His position now is that I should have assumed he expected me to pay half the bills.

Another source of conflict is my mother. She suffers from severe agoraphobia and anxiety that worsened after her car accident. She barely left the house for years and would not meet almost anyone, including close friends. She did not meet my boyfriend in person until nearly two years into our relationship. This was not directed at him personally. She was isolating from everyone. She is currently trying to find work and become financially independent again.

During the last two years, I supported my boyfriend through the loss of his father, family disputes, estate conflicts, financial stress, problems with friends and roommates, and emotional crises. I also made efforts to maintain relationships with his family, even when I was not always treated kindly.

I never asked him to choose between me and his family or suggested that helping them meant he did not care about me. What hurts is that the person who asked me to support him through difficult family circumstances is now angry that I support my own family through theirs.

The only support I am not providing is the specific financial contribution he wants. I give him $100 per month, buy groceries for both of us, and prepare our lunches. He argues that every relationship should be 50/50 financially. I understand that perspective, but I am not choosing between paying his bills and keeping money for myself. I am supporting a disabled brother and a struggling mother—responsibilities he knew about from the beginning.

AITA for not paying half and supporting my mother until she gets a job (which she is currently doing)?

06/11/2026

AITA for not splitting the Airbnb refund equally after my buddy ruined the trip
me and 3 guys rented an Airbnb in Barcelona for a week. we split it 4 ways upfront, i had some money saved on the side so i covered the deposit no big deal. anyway one of them (lets call him M) got into a massive argument with the host on day 3 over some stupid house rules thing and the host ended up kicking us all out early. we got a partial refund for the unused nights.

heres where it gets messy. M thinks we should split the refund equally like we did with the original cost. but me and the other two think he should get less since he literally caused us to leave. we lost money on activities we already booked and one of the guys had to pay to change his flight home.

M is saying im being "financially punitive" and that it was a miscommunication not his fault. the host literally has the whole thing documented tho.

i get hes still my boy but also like we all lost more than he did because of him. AITA?

06/09/2026

AITA, we can never go abroad as a family because my sisters boyfriend refuses to fly
my sisters boyfriend refuses to fly, full stop. its an anxiety thing, hes never been on a plane in his life and he wont even discuss the idea of trying. anything we plan as a family has to be somewhere we can drive to or take the train, every single time.

my niece, her daughter, has been desperate to go on a proper holiday abroad, somewhere like spain or greece, for years. my sister keeps snapping that suggesting that excludes her boyfriend. so we end up going to the same handful of seaside places over and over. ive suggested for years that he just sits the foreign trips out, hes a grown man, he can spend the week at home or with his own family, but my sister treats that like ive proposed leaving him in a ditch.

ive also suggested he comes to the airport, sees us off, and joins us on video calls during the week, which loads of people with travel anxiety actually do. apparently still excluding him. my mum has been retired for two years and shes never had a proper trip abroad with the family, shed love to, and my niece rarely gets to go anywhere with her mum because my sister only ever wants the same uk weekends my niece doesnt enjoy.

my sister says we should go abroad on trips that arent "family ones," but if i go away with my niece and my brother hears, hed obviously want in, then so would my mum, and before you know it its a family trip without my sister. plus organising two separate trips a year is silly money. id rather we all go together once.

it got truly extreme when i planned my milestone birthday weekend. id wanted to do barcelona, my sister pushed and pushed until i had to swap it for a lake district place that served burgers. yes my own birthday.

were arguing every single time. AITA?

TLDR: my sisters boyfriend wont fly so every family trip has to be in the uk, the same handful of seaside places again and again. my niece is desperate for a proper holiday abroad, my mums never had one with us, and every single workaround i suggest, him sitting it out, joining on calls, is twisted into me excluding him. i even had to swap barcelona for the lake district for my own milestone birthday. AITA?

06/09/2026

Wibtah if I complained about a woman in my hospital room

English Second Language

I just had a 6 hour endometriosis surgery this morning and am in the hospital. I can barely sit up yet and am still n**e from the surgery although I have a blanket. I am also in pain and very tired.

After the surgery, they put another woman in the bed next to me in the room, there is a divider but it's not very big at all. She has been on the phone on loudspeaker for hours, then her husband came to visit while I was asleep and I woke up and he was standing at the end of my bed staring at me. I was partly covered by the blanket but still n**e and too immobile to cover myself properly. He also came over to my side of the room a few times although he had reasons like closing curtains and taking a chair. Still I am uncomfortable. The woman is a hijabi so imo he should know even more than the average man to respect a woman's modesty.

Also after I woke up she kept coming to ask me questions. Some are personal and some are hospital related that I had to Google for her like when the visiting hours start. I don't really want to talk to anyone and it's worse because we are both immigrants with different native languages and she speaks no English nor does she speak the language of the country we are in very well. So I am struggling to understand and answer her questions. Also imo she should ask the nurse and leave me alone.

I will be here for another 6 days and she will be here at least 4. Wibtah if I complained about her and her husband? I'm very upset and feel very exposed and i'm tired and want her to be quiet and leave me alone. But I think she is nervous and bored and trying to be friendly

Edit just to clarify I did suggest she ask the nurses because I didn't know the answer to some of her questions (and the rest I didn't want to answer because they were imo invasive) but she doesn't understand me because of the language issues. Perhaps next time I will just press the call button

Update I spoke to the nurses, they said they will document the husband issue and get back to me about it before visiting hours tomorrow, and in the meantime they asked her to take off the loudspeaker. Shout out to the person who suggested I write it down and show them, they were very discreet which makes me feel a lot more comfortable about it. The other patient hasn't had surgery yet so she is able to get up and walk around which is how she is coming to ask me questions so I was worried that she might understand enough of the conversation to be pi**ed off and confront me

Update again, a senior Dr came and took a photo of my text for documentation, then they helped me get dressed a bit more so I at least have a nightgown and underwear on because before I just had a surgery blanket lying over me, the Dr also spoke to the woman and told her she is to stop making phonecalls and use headphones which she is now doing. For everyone talking about private rooms, this is EU public healthcare they do not have private rooms. I had a different roommate yesterday and she was very nice and kept to herself so usually it's not a problem

Update 3, I am still in the same room and despite the fact that visiting hours aren't until the afternoon (it's 9am), he is here. He stared again but this time I was sitting up and dressed and conscious so I made eye contact and said hello. He said hello back, and took the spare chair but again he is sitting at the foot of her bed where he can see around the divider, and not beside her which is weird imo. But he doesn't appear to be staring anymore since I made eye contact. So I'm not super happy but I am not feeling as vulnerable as yesterday either. He is apparently here to help her communicate with the dr because he does speak some German so hopefully he won't be here all day

06/07/2026

AITA for not doing a refund?

AITA I sold an AC unit on Facebook Market place for $50 dollars. The guy who picked it up said he has been burnt on market place many times before so he said he had to see it working first. We met at a pavilion at a beach and I plugged the AC unit in. I let the unit run for 5 minutes and it was pumping cold air the entire time while it was 25°C / 77°F. I’ve used this ac unit for 3 years now and it’s always worked and kept my room at 12°C / 54°F if l left it running too long. So we do the exchange and the guy has had the AC unit for 1 week now and wants a refund. I said no because we tested it and both felt it was pumping cold air and he’s had it for a week now so idk what he could’ve done with it and I don’t know where it’s been. The AC model is a Haier which when researching I saw that they rarely breakdown and it has worked fine for me the last 4 years of using it.

06/07/2026

Hi! First time wanting some opinions because I feel terrible right now and am on my way to a surgeon so i need a clear mind...

Last night a mutual friend reached out. They are a few states away so I'm unfortunately unable to just jump in my car and head their way. Anyway, this person was texting me some very concerning stuff. They were saying they are fixin' to end it all in that moment. They said I shouldn't be TOO concerned because they already locked up all their pew pet's and hid the key(this person was heavily intoxicated for context, i know that doesnt make a lick of logical sense) I begged and pleaded for their contact information(phone number,address) as i haven't spoken to them in a really long time and people's situations change all the time. They refused. Told me its too late for that and they already made up their mind. I told them that's BS and if they were truly going to do it they would have instead of messaging me. Messaging me instead shows they really dont want to d*e and reached out for a olive branch instead. They still refused and I went to bed. I woke up this morning and reached out to check on them. They still refused to accept help so I decided to do what any logical person would do and called the sheriff's office in their town. Gave them as much info as I could. They found them. And now this person is mad at me. Mad at me for saving their life. Im not sure how to feel right now. I want to block them but don't want to cut them off in case they ever do need me in the future. They said they will never trust me and open up to me again. Im feeling very sad and dont know if I overstepped or if this is just normal for someone that desperate. Ugh. 😔💔

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Manhattan, NY

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