07/23/2026
https://www.facebook.com/share/p/1GxbJ39dch/
There are a few words we offer almost automatically when someone receives a life-changing diagnosis.
"It's going to be okay."
We say them because we care.
We say them because we want to offer hope.
We say them because watching someone suffer is incredibly hard.
We say them... because WE want to believe them.
But I often wonder...
Who are those words really comforting?
The person living with the diagnosis?
Or the people standing around them?
Sometimes...it's not going to be “okay.”
Sometimes the treatment doesn't work.
Sometimes the disease progresses.
Sometimes there isn't another option to try.
Sometimes someone is dying.
And imagine what it must feel like to hear, over and over again, "It's going to be okay," while quietly wondering, "I don't think it is."
That can become an incredibly lonely place.
I don't believe hope has to disappear simply because we tell the truth, in fact, I think hope changes.
At first, hope may be for a cure.
Then it becomes hope for more time.
Hope for less pain.
Hope for one more birthday.
One more Christmas.
One more conversation.
One more sunrise.
And eventually, hope may become something as simple, and as profound, as not being alone.
What if, instead of trying to convince someone that everything will be okay, we simply remind them they don't have to walk through whatever comes next by themselves?
Instead of... "It's going to be okay."
Maybe we say... "I don't know exactly how this will unfold, but I'm here."
Or...
"This is really hard, and you don't have to carry it alone."
Or perhaps the most honest words we can offer are simply:
"However, this plays out...I've got you."
Those words don't promise an outcome we cannot guarantee.
They promise presence. And sometimes presence is the greatest comfort we have to give.
Maybe it's time we stop protecting ourselves from hard conversations and start trusting that people can handle the truth when it is wrapped in compassion.
Honesty doesn't take hope away, sometimes...it becomes hope.
xo
Gabby
www.thehospiceheart.net