04/01/2026
I wasn’t going to say anything yet… but word travels fast around here.
After months of observation, dedication, and what I would describe as exceptional emotional intelligence, I’ve officially been cleared to assist with patrol.
Yes. That patrol.
Before you ask, yes, I can reach the pedals.
No, I will not be taking questions about how.
My responsibilities include:
• Riding along to keep morale high
• Monitoring for suspicious activity (mostly squirrels)
• Providing emotional support during traffic stops
• Testing the sirens (my personal favorite)
Deputy Downey says I still need a little more “training” before I can drive solo, but I think he’s underestimating me.
For now, I’ll be in the passenger seat… watching, learning, and preparing for my moment. If you see us out, don’t worry.
Everything is under control.
—Strider
Future Driver. Current Good Boy.