08/13/2023
{SIXTEEN}
Today marks 16 years since we met the antepartum world. A world of maternal-fetal specialists, terbutaline, procardia, magnesium sulfate, polyhydramnios, amnioreductions, amniotic fluid testing, betamethasone, fetal fibronectin testing, non stress tests, prescribed sleep medication, strict bed rest, clock watching, NICU talks, pool therapy, receiving news you don't want to hear and automatically disliking the healthcare professional because of the news they told you. The amount of emotions that consume one during this time is overwhelming; the fear of having to care for a pre term infant, the anxiety that automatically shows up, sleepless nights thinking the reality could be this pregnancy ending in devastation, trying not to think about the financial aspect, missing your children at home, the relief that you kept your baby or babies in utero another day, the stress when the fetal monitoring isn't going well.....I remember in detail my heart feeling like it was broken to pieces wondering "how am I going to me forward after this?"
I can tell you this, you move forward. It is difficult, but you do move forward. You will have a different perspective on life. I am less tolerant of certain personalities. Some days I worry more because I experienced a reality that wasn't suppose to happen. Other days I have no fear because I experienced what most don't-the loss of a child.
When I look back on 16 years I confidently say "I wouldn't change a thing." 16 years ago what we experienced shaped us into what we are doing today: Acts of Grace Foundation