08/26/2026
🎒💜 WELCOME BACK, MIDDLE SCHOOLERS! 💜🎒
And welcome back to the parents who are about to spend another school year pretending we understand what our kids are saying. 😂
We’re ready for another year of:
✨ “Bet.” — Apparently this means okay and has nothing to do with gambling.
✨ “Cooked.” — Bad. Very bad. Possibly doomed.
✨ “Let him cook.” — Good? We think? No actual cooking involved.
✨ “That’s fire.” — Also good. Please do not call the fire department.
✨ “Bro.” — Your child. Their friend. You. The dog. Everyone is Bro.
✨ “Lowkey.” — Usually followed by something that is definitely not lowkey.
✨ “Aura.” — You can gain it. You can lose it. Parents apparently start with very little.
✨ “Crash out.” — What parents do after trying to understand all of the above. 🤣
Middle school parents, we’ve got this.
Or, as the kids might say…
We’re locked in. No cap. 💀
(We think. Please don’t ask us to use it in a sentence. 😂)
💜🐾 Happy first day back, EMS! Here’s to a great school year!