07/05/2025
Wolves and PTSD
Dealing with police su***de daily, for the love of my community, I’ve opened my life to reach my brothers and sisters.
I began as a cadet in 1990, full-time officer in 1995. My supervisors, many Vietnam vets. Handlebar mustaches, wheel guns and on their second or third wife—you get the picture.
Booze and ci**rs were how we decompressed. Rookies sat at separate tables for no reason other than they were new and unproven.
For me-my squad could always count on me to have their backs. I was always there. My beat partners knew I would fight and never back down.
But I was dying inside. What I experienced and saw changed me. Nightmares, sleepless nights, internal investigations, and bad decisions led me to the doctor.
Report conclusion: “Officer Stine lives in a constant state of fight or flight.”
Result: medical retirement.
This followed me into my relationships with spouse, partners, family, and friends.
I hate when people make excuses for their flaws. But to truly change, you must know why you do what you do. Police don’t have time to be your therapist at a call. We hunt for truth, spot lies, and act decisively.
In my relationships, when I heard something contradictory, confusing, or what I perceived as false, I corrected immediately. I talked over and controlled the situation. That often damaged the relationship. When the other person doesn’t feel safe to speak without fear, they close off. No emotional safety.
I’ve dug deep and still am. I’ve learned it’s OK to let people speak without correction or argument. We all crave that. We just need to be heard. When they feel safe to express themselves, trust grows and relationships strengthen. This awareness can lead to real change, even if your past has affected you negatively.
Many who have been with police officers have shared this. While it’s not only cops who are negatively reactive, it runs strong in our culture.
Just because you were raised by wolves doesn’t mean you have to become one—or stay one.