09/01/2018
August 31, 2018 is a milestone for our family this year - not a good one really - it marks the 10th year of Max going to heaven.
It was a Sunday at 8:45pm. Our extended family had been with us for several hours during the day as we celebrated Nick turning 3, two weeks early, and everyone was able to spend a little quiet time with Max on the couch. He wasn't feeling well, but I think he enjoyed the company and the quiet attention from cousins, aunts, uncles, and grandparents - just sitting with him, watching his TV shows. For the past two weeks the family room couch had been his space, and a place he was comfortable.
Later that night, Andy and I were trying desperately to help Max get comfortable. He was so unsettled, and still so sweet. We realized this might be a very long night, so I had just phoned my sister to please come over and help with Hannah and Nick overnight and in the morning.
Before she made it to the house, Max had left us.
We were getting him settled in our bed, and things changed. He stared for a very long time into a corner of the room like he was seeing a place or a someone to go to. Andy and I looked at each other - I think we both knew that this was the moment. Andy said to him to take Jesus' hand. We both said I love you. And he was gone.
10 years ago. It seems like yesterday, except the jaggedness of it has worn down. I'm able to breathe. Does that stop me/us from crying - no. Losing a child is the worse loss.
We tell this story in order to help other families from having to experience this.
Today also marks the birthday of Ezra Matthews. You all know Ezra's mom Robyn and dad Kyle. That our two families share this painful day is not random. That we didn't discover this shared date of pain until after our Max and Ezra died and had been working together and funding the work of Dr. Sholler is not random. That dozens of families and tens of thousands of others have taken notice, taken action, and have already made a meaningful difference in the lives of kids and their families battling cancer is not random.
It is because of couragious purpose. Kyle wrote about that courage recently after visiting us in San Diego. Here's what he had to say: https://thematthewsstory.com/2018/06/05/i-thank-you-for-your-courage/
Live Life to the Max.
Melissa, Max's mom