09/24/2026
Perhaps the most confusing part of biblical forgiveness is the failure to distinguish the difference between the forgiveness of the divine penalty for sins and the forgiveness of the negative consequences of sins.
Every sin is a crime against God who made and commanded us to love God and to love oneanother, just as He loves us. Every crime has a penalty. The divine penatly for any and every sin is death; physical ex*****on by God.
But every sin is also a destructive act. Every sin sets in motion a chain reation of negative consequences; physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, relational, environmental, economic, political, etc. consequences. God calls these consequences "death" since they rob us of life.
God forgives the divine penalty for all of the sins of the world by laying them on the body of His Son, Jesus Christ, who volunteered for this, and then executing Him instead of executing us. God forgives us because Jesus died for us, in our places, to pay the penalty for our sins. God's justice has been satisfied through the death of Jesus. God has forgiven us of the divine penalty for our sins, meaning He no longer needs to execute or punish us, because He already punished Jesus. Hallelujah!!!
However, sins are still destructive. The sins we have committed in the past, and the sins committed against us, are killing us. God says He can and wants to forgive us of the consequences of these sins (i.e. heal us, reconcile us, restore us, etc.) but can only do that if we want to stop sinning (repent). God cannot save people from the consequences of sins people do not want to stop committing. Committing a sin is like putting your hand on a hot stove. You will get burned, not because God is punishing you, but because that is the natural consequence of putting you hand on a hot stove. God can heal your hand, forgive the consequence, but only if you take your hand off of the stove. He cannot heal a burnt hand that is still on the stove.
This is the pattern of how we are to forgive others. When people sin against us our hearts cry out for justice, for retribution, for revenge. We need to see them suffer for what they did to us. But when we believe and feel the truth the God punished Jesus for what they did to us, we can join with God in His forgiveness of them. Our heart's cry for justice can be satisfied at the Cross of Christ just as God's heart's cry for justice was satisfied there! We can forgive others because Jesus died for them, just as He died for us.
However, unless they repent, we should not forgive (lessen the negative consequences) of that sin. God does not forgive the negative consequences of unrepentant people, nor should we. If we do, we become co-dependant enablers of other people's sins. But when someone truly repents, and demonstrates it, we need to be ready and willing to lessen the consequences and lower the God-authorized boundaries we set up to protect ourselve and others from an unrepentant person.
We call the first side of forgiveness Personal Forgiveness because it is between you an God, even when you are forgiving someone else. Personal Forgiveness is releasing someone guilty of sin from having the pay the penalty for their sin in light of the fact that God has alreacy punished Jesus Christ in full to pay for their sins. This is what God has already done with every human being; "Behold the Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world." And this is what we can do when we believe that truth.
We call the second side of forgiveness Relational Forgiveness because it is the basis for a restored relationship. Relational Forgiveness is reducing the negative consequences of a sin appropriate to the guilty person's level of repentance. This is what God is doing with you when you repent, and what we need to do when other people repent.
This is why in the Bible forgiveness is sometimes spoken about as being unconditional, and sometimes conditional.
"When you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive..." Mark 11:25
and
"If someone sins against you, go and rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him..." Luke 17:3
How can forgiveness be both conditional and unconditional? It all depends on which side of sin is being forgiven. Understanding the two sides of sin and forgiveness is critical to practicing it effectively.
Learn what real forgiveness is, why it is so important for inner healing and loving relationships, and how to practice it.