24/01/2026
Who said if you propose to a Man, you will die…waya fada hakan?
And while I understand the intention to normalize that women can express interest, my concern is not that a lady will proposed, Islam already settled that matter.
My concern is the need to announce it publicly, defensively, and proudly (let me justify my take).
📌First, nobody said you would die, YES!
Nana Khadijah (RA) proposed to the Prophet ﷺ and her honor increased, not reduced.
📌Second, we didn’t ask.
Not every personal marital detail needs a microphone. Islam encourages (discretion). Marriage is honorable, yes but intimacy, beginnings, and private paths to union are not meant to be public lessons unless there is clear wisdom and careful framing.
📌Third and this is the heaviest part: who is the audience you shared this info for and what is the implication?
We sometimes failed to keep in mind the time we are in now where:
•Many men are emotionally unserious.
•Commitment is delayed, avoided, or outsourced.
•Some men enjoy attention without responsibility.
When a married woman with the privilege of “ya aureni ai” loudly proclaims, “I proposed and it worked”, without context, guidance, or warnings, you are not speaking to men, you are influencing young, hopeful, naive girls.
Girls who may now think:
“Let me confess, let me chase, let me lower my guard, maybe marriage will come.”
Islam does not teach women to throw their hearts into uncertainty. Islam teaches wisdom, guardianship, clarity, and protection of the soul. Modesty is not just in clothes. Modesty is also in speech, exposure, and restraint.
Let’s be guided, Allah yasa mudace.ameen 🙏🏿