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Soaring Beyond Ordinary, Ogbomoso (2026)

04/08/2026

1. Understand this and know peace
“S*x before marriage is like stealing from one’s dinner”
You are taking something good and God-designed
But taking it at the wrong time and in the wrong way
S*x itself is not evil—it is a gift from God meant for marriage. The problem is timing and covenant.
📖 Hebrews 13:4 – “Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure…”
2. God’s Design for S*x
God designed s*x to be:
A covenant act (not just emotional or physical)
A bonding experience between husband and wife
A spiritual union, not just physical pleasure
📖 Genesis 2:24 – “…and they shall become one flesh.”
That “one flesh” is not just body—it includes:
Emotions
Spirit
Identity
When this happens outside marriage, it creates confusion and damage.
3. Effects of S*x Before Marriage
(a) Emotional Consequences
Creates deep attachment too early
Makes breakups more painful
Leads to comparison in future marriage
You may think you are just “enjoying love,” but you are actually forming a bond that is hard to break.
(b) Spiritual Consequences
Weakens your relationship with God
Brings guilt and distance from the Holy Spirit
Opens the door to repeated sin
📖 1 Corinthians 6:18 – “Flee from s*xual immorality…”
Notice the word flee—not manage, not control—run from it.
(c) Distortion of Courtship Purpose
Courtship is meant for:
Knowing each other’s values
Building spiritual compatibility
Preparing for marriage commitment
But once s*x enters:
Focus shifts from purpose → pleasure
Decision-making becomes emotional, not wise
Red flags are ignored
(d) Effect on Future Marriage
This is where many youths underestimate the impact.
Loss of trust (especially if the pattern continues)
Difficulty with faithfulness
Reduced sense of sacredness in marriage
Comparison with past partners
Even if you marry the same person, you may carry:
Guilt
Regret
Emotional scars
(e) Loss of Self-Control
S*x before marriage trains the mind to:
Seek instant gratification
Ignore discipline
Justify sin easily
But marriage requires:
Patience
Sacrifice
Self-control
📖 Galatians 5:22-23 – “…the fruit of the Spirit is… self-control.”
4. Why Many Youths Fall Into It
Let’s be honest:
Pressure from partner (“If you love me…”)
Social media influence
Lack of boundaries
Staying alone together too often
Weak spiritual life
This is not just about desire—it’s about lack of structure and discipline.
5. Practical Guidance for Christian Courtship
Set Clear Boundaries Early
Agree: “We will not have s*x before marriage.”
Avoid compromising environments
Avoid Temptation Triggers
Late-night visits
Isolated places
Physical closeness without limits
Stay Spiritually Strong
Pray together
Study the Bible
Be accountable to a mentor or pastor
Choose Purpose Over Feelings
Love is not just emotions—it is obedience to God.
📖 John 14:15 – “If you love me, keep my commandments.”
6. A Balanced Truth (Very Important)
If someone has already fallen into this sin:
They are not finished
God offers forgiveness and restoration
📖 1 John 1:9 – “If we confess our sins, He is faithful… to forgive…”
But forgiveness does not remove all consequences, which is why wisdom matters early.
7. Final Reality Check
S*x before marriage doesn’t just affect your body—it affects:
Your future
Your marriage
Your spiritual life
Discipline now will save you from regret later.

18/07/2026

RESULTS OF DESPERATION IN COURTSHIP
Desperation in courtship often leads individuals away from God’s will and into choices driven by fear, loneliness, or impatience. The Bible consistently warns against acting out of desperation, emphasizing trust in God’s timing and guidance.

1. Compromise of Godly Standards
Desperation can cause a person to lower their spiritual and moral standards just to be in a relationship. Scripture warns in 2 Corinthians 6:14 against being unequally yoked with unbelievers. When one is desperate, they may ignore this instruction, leading to spiritual conflict and instability.

2. Loss of Discernment
A desperate heart struggles to hear God clearly. Instead of seeking divine direction, decisions are rushed. Proverbs 3:5-6 teaches us to trust in the Lord and not lean on our own understanding, but desperation often leads to self-directed choices that end in regret.

3. Emotional Bo***ge and Idolatry
Desperation can turn a relationship into an idol, where a person places their partner above God. This contradicts Exodus 20:3, which commands that we should have no other gods before Him. Such attachment can lead to emotional dependency and spiritual emptiness.

4. Premature and Ungodly Decisions
Desperation may push individuals into relationships or marriages that are not ordained by God. In Genesis 16, Sarah’s desperation led her to give Hagar to Abraham, resulting in long-term conflict and consequences.

5. Heartbreak and Disappointment
When relationships are built on desperation rather than divine guidance, they often lead to pain. Jeremiah 17:5 warns that trusting in man instead of God brings disappointment.

6. Loss of Peace
God’s will brings peace (Colossians 3:15), but desperation brings anxiety, fear, and confusion. A relationship entered in desperation lacks the calm assurance that comes from God’s approval.

7. Delay of God’s Best
By settling out of desperation, a person may miss or delay the partner God truly intended. Ecclesiastes 3:11 reminds us that God makes everything beautiful in His time—not in our haste.

Conclusion
Desperation in courtship leads to poor decisions, spiritual compromise, and emotional pain. The Bible encourages patience, faith, and total reliance on God. Instead of rushing into relationships, believers are called to wait on the Lord (Isaiah 40:31), trusting that His plan is perfect and worth the wait.

27/05/2026

DON'T BE DESPERATE
Choosing a life partner is not something to rush or treat lightly. As a Christian, it is a decision that should be guided by wisdom, prayer, and patience—not desperation.
Marriage is a lifelong covenant. The person you choose is someone you will spend more years with than you ever did with your parents. That alone should make you slow down and think deeply. The Bible reminds us in Ecclesiastes 3:1 that “to everything there is a season.” If it is not yet your time, forcing it can lead to regret.
Desperation often leads people to ignore red flags, compromise their values, and settle for less than God’s best. But God’s plan is not built on anxiety or fear. 2 Timothy 1:7 says, “For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind.” A sound mind means making wise, calm, and prayerful decisions—not rushed emotional ones.
Remember, marriage is not just about companionship; it is about purpose. The person you choose will influence your spiritual growth, your decisions, your future, and even your relationship with God. That is why 2 Corinthians 6:14 warns us not to be unequally yoked. Compatibility in faith, values, and vision matters deeply.
Instead of being desperate, focus on becoming the right person. Grow spiritually, build your character, develop patience, and trust God’s timing. When you are whole and grounded in Christ, you are more likely to recognize the right partner when they come.
Also, understand this truth: being single is not a curse. It is a season of preparation. Rushing out of it can lead you into a lifetime of struggle. It is better to wait long and marry right than to hurry and marry wrong.
So be calm. Pray consistently. Seek God’s direction. And trust that the same God who writes your story knows exactly who fits into it.
When the time is right, it will not require desperation—only confirmation.

01/05/2026

Solutions to Trust Issues in Courtship and Insecurity
Open and Honest Communication
Partners should express their feelings, fears, and concerns clearly. Hiding emotions or keeping secrets only worsens trust issues. Honest communication helps both partners understand each other better.
Build Trust Gradually
Trust is not built in one day. It requires consistent effort. Keeping promises, being truthful, and showing reliability over time helps to strengthen trust in the relationship.
Avoid Unnecessary Secrecy
Transparency is important in courtship. While privacy is respected, partners should not engage in suspicious behavior that may create doubt or fear.
Work on Self-Confidence
Insecurity often comes from low self-esteem. Individuals should develop confidence in themselves, know their worth, and avoid constant need for validation from their partner.
Avoid Jealousy and Comparison
Comparing your relationship with others or being overly jealous can damage trust. Each relationship is unique and should be treated as such.
Forgiveness and Letting Go of the Past
If trust has been broken before, both partners must be willing to forgive and move forward. Holding onto past mistakes will keep the relationship unhealthy.
Set Healthy Boundaries
Partners should agree on acceptable behavior in the relationship. Clear boundaries help prevent misunderstandings and build mutual respect.
Seek Guidance When Necessary
Talking to a trusted mentor, counselor, or religious leader can help resolve deep trust issues and insecurities.
Be Patient and Understanding
Overcoming trust issues takes time. Partners should be patient with each other and show empathy rather than reacting harshly.
Strengthen Emotional Connection
Spending quality time together, supporting each other, and showing care can reduce insecurity and improve trust.
Conclusion
Trust issues and insecurity can be overcome if both partners are committed to growth. With honesty, patience, and mutual understanding, a healthy and stable courtship can be achieved.

22/04/2026

TRUST ISSUES IN COURTSHIP AND INSECURITY
Courtship is a period when two individuals get to know each other deeply with the intention of marriage. It is expected to be built on honesty, understanding, and mutual respect. However, one of the major problems that can affect courtship is trust issues, which often lead to insecurity.
Trust is the foundation of any meaningful relationship. When there is trust, partners feel safe, valued, and confident in each other. But when trust is broken or absent, it creates doubt, fear, and suspicion. Trust issues in courtship may arise from past experiences such as betrayal, cheating, or disappointment. It can also come from lack of communication, dishonesty, or inconsistent behavior.
Insecurity, on the other hand, is a feeling of uncertainty or lack of confidence in oneself or in the relationship. A person who is insecure may constantly seek reassurance, feel jealous, or fear losing their partner. Insecurity is often closely linked to trust issues. When someone does not trust their partner, they may begin to imagine things that are not real, leading to unnecessary conflicts.
Trust issues and insecurity can have serious effects on courtship. They can lead to frequent arguments, emotional stress, and lack of peace in the relationship. One partner may feel controlled or suffocated, while the other feels neglected or unloved. If not properly addressed, these problems can eventually lead to the breakdown of the relationship.
To overcome trust issues and insecurity, both partners must be willing to work together. Open and honest communication is very important. Partners should express their feelings without fear and listen to each other with understanding. Building trust takes time, so patience is necessary. Keeping promises, being transparent, and showing consistency in actions can help rebuild trust.
In addition, individuals should work on their self-confidence. A person who values themselves is less likely to feel insecure. Avoid comparing your relationship with others, and focus on building a healthy and supportive bond.
In conclusion, trust and security are essential for a successful courtship. Without them, the relationship cannot grow properly. Therefore, both partners must make conscious efforts to build trust, communicate effectively, and support each other in order to have a stable and lasting relationship.
Note: I will drop the solution soon, stay tuned.

20/04/2026

THE PURPOSE OF COURTSHIP (part two)
1. God must be at the center—not just invited in
A lot of people say “God is in our relationship,” but practically, He’s not leading anything.
Honoring God means:
You both seek His will first, not just your emotions
You pray individually and together
You’re willing to obey God even if it’s uncomfortable
👉 Proverbs 3:5-6
“Trust in the Lord… and He will direct your paths.”
🔹 2. Purity is not optional
This is one of the biggest tests.
Courtship that honors God avoids:
S*xual intimacy
S*xual touching and immoral conversations
Situations that create strong temptation
Why? Because once physical desire takes over, clear thinking reduces.
👉 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5
“It is God’s will that you should be sanctified… avoid s*xual immorality.”
Real truth:
If a relationship cannot survive without physical intimacy, it is not strong enough for marriage.
🔹 3. Accountability is necessary
Don’t try to “be strong” alone.
Have:
A mentor (pastor, older married person)
Trusted friends who can correct you
Openness about your relationship
👉 Proverbs 11:14
“In the multitude of counselors there is safety.”
This protects you from blind spots and emotional mistakes.
🔹 4. Don’t ignore red flags because of “love”
Some people say: “God told me this is my partner” but ignore obvious issues like:
Bad character
Lack of respect
Spiritual laziness
God will not lead you into something that contradicts His standards.
👉 2 Corinthians 6:14
“Do not be unequally yoked…”
🔹 5. Build spiritual unity early
It’s not enough that both of you are “religious.”
Ask:
Do we grow spiritually together?
Can we pray and study the Bible together?
Do we encourage each other to be better?
If you can’t connect spiritually now, marriage won’t fix it.
🔹 6. Set clear boundaries
Don’t “go with the flow”—that’s how people fall into regret.
Examples:
Avoid staying alone in private places late at night
Agree on physical limits
Decide how often and where you meet
Boundaries don’t restrict love—they protect it.
🔹 7. Be willing to walk away if it’s not right
This is the hardest part.
Honoring God means:
You don’t force a relationship
You don’t stay because of fear or attachment
You trust that God can give you something better
👉 Romans 8:28
“All things work together for good…”
⚠️ Honest truth you need to hear
A “Godly courtship” is not about:
Posting couple pictures
Calling each other “king” and “queen”
Just praying together sometimes
It’s about discipline, sacrifice, and alignment with God’s standards.

16/04/2026

THE PURPOSE OF COURTSHIP(part one)
Courtship isn’t just “dating for fun.” It has a clear purpose, especially if you’re serious about your future. Here’s what it’s really for:
1. To know each other deeply
Courtship gives you time to understand the person’s character, values, habits, and mindset—not just their nice side. You’re checking: Who are they really?
2. To test compatibility
Love alone is not enough. Courtship helps you see if you both agree on important things like:
Faith and beliefs
Life goals
Family values
Finances and responsibilities
3. To build friendship and trust
A strong relationship is built on genuine friendship. Courtship allows trust, respect, and communication to grow naturally.
4. To seek direction for marriage
The main goal of courtship is clarity: “Can I spend my life with this person?”
If the answer becomes no, it’s better to end it early than enter a wrong marriage.
5. To develop emotional maturity
You learn patience, self-control, understanding, and how to handle conflicts properly.
6. (For Christians) To honor God
Courtship is meant to be done with discipline, purity, and purpose—not driven by pressure or lust. It should align with biblical principles.
Real talk
If there’s no clear purpose, courtship can waste your time and emotions. It’s not about how long you date—it’s about how intentional you are.Courtship isn’t just “dating for fun.” It has a clear purpose, especially if you’re serious about your future. Here’s what it’s really for:
1. To know each other deeply
Courtship gives you time to understand the person’s character, values, habits, and mindset—not just their nice side. You’re checking: Who are they really?
2. To test compatibility
Love alone is not enough. Courtship helps you see if you both agree on important things like:
Faith and beliefs
Life goals
Family values
Finances and responsibilities
3. To build friendship and trust
A strong relationship is built on genuine friendship. Courtship allows trust, respect, and communication to grow naturally.
4. To seek direction for marriage
The main goal of courtship is clarity: “Can I spend my life with this person?”
If the answer becomes no, it’s better to end it early than enter a wrong marriage.
5. To develop emotional maturity
You learn patience, self-control, understanding, and how to handle conflicts properly.
6. (For Christians) To honor God
Courtship is meant to be done with discipline, purity, and purpose—not driven by pressure or lust. It should align with biblical principles.
Real talk
If there’s no clear purpose, courtship can waste your time and emotions. It’s not about how long you date—it’s about how intentional you are.
If you have any questions or you need help you can message me privately (Whatsapp: 08109277402)

Soaring Beyond Ordinary

04/08/2026

18/07/2026

27/05/2026

01/05/2026

22/04/2026

20/04/2026

16/04/2026

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