02/06/2026
The comments are always the same.
Children out of education for months.
Children out of education for years.
No school place.
No Section 19 provision.
Tribunal hearings over 12 months away.
Children struggling.
Parents exhausted.
And then come the opinions from people who have never lived it.
Do people really think parents want this?
Do they think parents want to spend their days chasing appointments that should have happened months or years ago?
Fighting for assessments?
Chasing reports?
Writing complaints?
Preparing tribunal bundles late into the night?
Do they think parents enjoy receiving phone calls from school asking them to collect their child yet again because they are overwhelmed, dysregulated, suspended, excluded or simply unable to cope?
Do they think parents want to sit in car parks trying to convince a terrified child to walk through the school gates?
Do they think parents want to give up careers, reduce hours, lose jobs and sacrifice financial security because no school can or will meet their child's needs?
And let's not forget many of our children don't sleep.
Some sleep for a few hours.
Some are awake half the night.
Some are awake most of the night.
Yet somehow parents are expected to spend the next day fighting systems, attending appointments, chasing professionals and advocating for their children on little more than caffeine and determination.
Many of our children still need full support with basic daily tasks.
The evening routine that might take another family 20 minutes can take us two hours.
First comes the battle to get them into the bath or shower.
Then the battle to wash.
Then the battle to get out.
Then the battle to get dry.
Then the battle to get dressed.
And some parents are doing this with two, three or four children at the same time whilst trying to keep everyone safe.
Meanwhile we're told Disability Living Allowance is some sort of luxury.
The reality?
Many families are using that money to fund private assessments because NHS waiting lists stretch into years.
Private tutoring because children have been left without education.
Private therapies because provision isn't being delivered.
All whilst paying the additional costs that come with raising a disabled child.
And after all of that, there is always someone ready to tell us:
"You should have waited until you were financially stable before having children."
As though any parent can predict disability.
As though any parent can predict a system that repeatedly fails children.
As though the answer to a broken system is simply not having disabled children in the first place.
No parent dreams of becoming an expert in SEND law.
No parent dreams of spending years fighting schools, local authorities, health services and tribunals.
We do it because the alternative is watching our children be failed.
The people making decisions about our children rarely live with the consequences of those decisions.
But our children do.
And so do their families.