YANA You Are Not Alone

15/10/2026

Controlling Behaviour – Smurtinis kontroliavimas
Controlling behaviour is a form of domestic abuse. It happens when someone tries to control your life, choices, freedom, and independence to gain power over you.
Examples of controlling behaviour:
Controlling who you can see, talk to, or be friends with.
Checking your phone, messages, or social media.
Telling you what to wear or where you can go.
Constantly questioning you, tracking your movements, or demanding to know where you are.
Controlling your money, work, or decisions.
Making you feel guilty, afraid, or worthless for doing things independently.
Isolating you from family and friends.
Making you feel you need permission to live your own life.
The truth is: Control is not love. Jealousy is not proof of love. You should never have to lose your freedom, identity, or peace to keep someone happy.
🇱🇹 Lietuviškai – kontroliuojantis elgesys
Kontroliuojantis elgesys yra viena iš smurto artimoje aplinkoje formų. Tai situacija, kai žmogus siekia kontroliuoti tavo gyvenimą, pasirinkimus, laisvę ir savarankiškumą, norėdamas įgyti galią prieš tave.
Kaip tai pasireiškia?
Kontroliuojama, su kuo gali bendrauti ir draugauti.
Tikrinamas telefonas, žinutės ir socialiniai tinklai.
Nurodoma, kaip rengtis, kur eiti ir ką daryti.
Nuolat reikalaujama atsiskaityti, kur esi ir su kuo.
Kontroliuojami tavo pinigai, darbas ir sprendimai.
Verčiama jaustis kalta, menkaverte ar bijoti savarankiškumo.
Stengiamasi atskirti nuo šeimos ir draugų.
Sukuriamas jausmas, kad net savo gyvenime privalai prašyti leidimo.
Tiesa yra tokia: Kontrolė nėra meilė. Pavydas nėra meilės įrodymas. Tau nereikia aukoti savo laisvės, tapatybės ir vidinės ramybės tam, kad įtiktum kitam žmogui.

14/10/2026

Digital abuse is a form of domestic abuse where someone uses technology, phones, social media or the internet to control, threaten, monitor, humiliate or frighten another person.
It can happen in relationships, even when the abuser is not physically present.
💔 Examples of digital abuse
📱 Monitoring your phone — checking your messages, calls, location or browsing history without your consent.
🔐 Controlling your accounts — demanding passwords or accessing your Facebook, email or other private accounts.
👀 Stalking online — constantly tracking where you are, who you speak to or what you post.
💬 Harassment and threats — sending abusive messages, intimidating you or threatening to expose private information.
💔 Cheating and manipulation online — using secret accounts, messages or online relationships to deceive and emotionally hurt you.
📸 Sharing private images — threatening to publish or sharing intimate pictures without your consent.
👥 Hacking or impersonation — accessing your accounts, pretending to be you or contacting your friends to damage your reputation.
The emotional impact
Digital abuse can make you feel watched, unsafe, anxious and unable to trust anyone. It can destroy your confidence and take away your sense of privacy and freedom.
Digital abuse is still abuse, even when there are no physical injuries. You have the right to privacy, respect and safety, both online and offline.

13/10/2026

Financial abuse is a form of domestic abuse. It happens when someone uses money, finances, or control over financial resources to control, trap, or make their partner dependent on them.
It is not just about taking someone’s money. It is about power, control, and taking away someone’s independence.
💔 Examples of financial abuse
Controlling your money — deciding what you can spend, demanding to know where every penny goes, or refusing to let you access your own money.
Preventing you from working — stopping you from having a job, pressuring you to leave work, or sabotaging your career.
Taking your money — using your wages, savings, or benefits without permission.
Creating debt in your name — forcing you to borrow money or making you responsible for debts you did not agree to.
Making you financially dependent — giving you no access to money while expecting you to rely entirely on them.
Sabotaging your security — leaving you without money, somewhere safe to live, or the means to support yourself after the relationship ends.
Using money as punishment — withholding money for food, bills, transport, or other basic needs to control you.
💔 What makes financial abuse so damaging?
Financial abuse can take away your freedom, your home, your job, your confidence, and your sense of security. You may feel trapped because leaving seems impossible when you have no money or nowhere to go.
Sometimes, the damage continues even after the relationship ends. The person responsible may carry on with their life while the survivor is left trying to rebuild everything they lost.
You do not have to be physically hurt for it to be domestic abuse. Financial, emotional, psychological, and coercive control can all be forms of abuse.
If someone deliberately leaves you without a home, undermines your ability to work, or uses money and security to control you, that may be part of an abusive pattern. The exact circumstances matter.

08/10/2026

Whittlesey we are coming!! Join our women only group. It is free and open to all women! Join us for activities, conversation and cake! We can't wait to see you!

08/10/2026

What is coercive control?

Coercive control is a pattern of behaviour where someone repeatedly tries to control, intimidate or dominate another person. It can happen in relationships, and it does not have to involve physical violence.

It can look like:

🔹 Constantly checking your phone, messages or social media
🔹 Demanding to know where you are and who you are with
🔹 Controlling your money or stopping you from working
🔹 Preventing you from seeing friends or family
🔹 Telling you what you can wear, eat or do
🔹 Making you feel that you need permission to go somewhere or make decisions
🔹 Repeatedly putting you down, humiliating or blaming you
🔹 Threatening you, your children, pets, family or belongings
🔹 Using children, money or housing to control you
🔹 Making you afraid of what will happen if you disagree or say no
🔹 Deliberately creating situations where you feel confused, dependent or powerless

It isn’t always obvious from the outside.

Someone experiencing coercive control may appear to have a “normal” relationship to other people. The controlling behaviour can happen gradually, becoming more restrictive over time.

Coercive control is about power, fear and taking away someone’s freedom and independence.

You don’t have to wait for physical violence before taking controlling behaviour seriously.
Control is not love. Fear is not respect.

21/09/2026

Physical abuse is when someone intentionally hurts or uses physical force against another person. Examples include:

* Hitting, punching or slapping
* Kicking or pushing
* Choking or strangling
* Hair pulling
* Biting or scratching
* Burning or scalding
* Throwing objects at someone
* Using or threatening to use a weapon
* Preventing someone from leaving or physically restraining them
* Deliberately causing injury or pain

In domestic abuse, physical violence can happen once or repeatedly, and it can exist alongside emotional, psychological, sexual or financial abuse.
Don’t suffer in silence!! You are not alone..
🚨 IN IMMEDIATE DANGER?

📞 Call 999 and ask for the police.

🤫 Can’t speak? Call 999 from a mobile and press 55 when prompted.

📱 National DA Helpline: 0808 2000 247
Free, confidential, 24/7.

19/09/2026

💜 SEKSUALINIS SMURTAS SANTYKIUOSE: KODĖL AUKA NE VISADA „KOVOJA“ AR IŠEINA?

Kai žmogus patiria seksualinį smurtą, kūnas ir smegenys gali automatiškai įjungti išgyvenimo reakciją. Tai nėra žmogaus pasirinkimas ir tikrai nėra sutikimas.

Yra 5 dažnai apibūdinamos reakcijos:

🥊 FIGHT – KOVA
Žmogus gali priešintis, stumti, mušti, rėkti, sakyti „NE“ arba bandyti sustabdyti smurtą.

🏃‍♀️ FLIGHT – BĖGIMAS
Žmogus gali bandyti pabėgti, išeiti iš situacijos, pasislėpti ar ieškoti saugios vietos.

🧊 FREEZE – SUSTINGIMAS
Žmogus gali visiškai sustingti, negalėti pajudėti ar pasakyti „ne“. Kartais žmogus atrodo tarsi atsiribojęs nuo to, kas vyksta.

🤝 FAWN – ĮTIKINĖJIMAS / ĮTIKIMAS
Žmogus gali bandyti nuraminti smurtautoją, sutikti, apsimesti, kad viskas gerai, arba daryti tai, ko iš jo reikalaujama, kad smurtas nesunkėtų.

😶 FLOP – „SUGLEBIMAS“
Žmogus gali prarasti gebėjimą aktyviai priešintis, atrodyti visiškai pasyvus ar atsiribojęs. Tai taip pat gali būti kūno reakcija į didžiulę grėsmę.

❗ Svarbu suprasti:
Jeigu žmogus nesipriešino, nerėkė, nesibėgo ar sustingo, tai nereiškia, kad jis sutiko.

Buvimas santuokoje ar ilgalaikiuose santykiuose taip pat nereiškia automatinio sutikimo seksui.

Sutikimas turi būti laisvas ir gali būti atšauktas bet kuriuo metu.

Kartais išgyvenusi moteris vėliau klausia savęs:
„Kodėl aš nekovojau?“
„Kodėl nepabėgau?“
„Kodėl leidau tai įvykti?“

Atsakymas gali būti labai paprastas: tavo kūnas tuo metu bandė tave išgelbėti.

💜 Tai ne tavo kaltė.

14/06/2026

Hello, Raimonda ❤️

I would like to thank you from the bottom of my heart for all the help, support, and human warmth you have given me. I am incredibly grateful that I had the opportunity to receive truly professional psychological support, as well as comprehensive assistance from you and the entire team.

Although I finished my individual consultations with Gerda in April, I am continuing my healing journey through the mutual-support group video meetings that I attend with her. 😊 I feel that this path is leading me toward a healthier, more mindful, and stronger life. 🙏

It is difficult to put into words how much this opportunity means to me and how profoundly it has changed my life. Thank you for your understanding, care, belief in me, and for helping me when I needed it most. ❤️

I wish you abundant light, strength, and goodness in return for everything you do for people. 🫶

11/06/2026

A huge thank you to Computers 4 Charities, for their generous donation of a computer to YANA – You Are Not Alone.

This donation will help us continue supporting people in our community and improve access to vital services and resources.

We are incredibly grateful for your kindness and support. Together, we can make a real difference.

07/06/2026