SHADE - Winnipeg

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SHADE - Winnipeg

We empower immigrant and refugee women and their children who have been impacted by domestic abuse.

03/06/2026

Join SHADE in celebrating International Women’s Day on March 6th!

02/14/2026

Happy Valentine’s Day from us at SHADE!
💕💕💕

02/13/2026

Podcast 8: Understanding the healing journey
This final episode in Season One of When Love Hurts podcast series is about healing in the context of abuse. The authors help us to imagine moving through a figure 8, where the lower loop represents grieving and the upper loop represents rebuilding. Women need time as there are so many losses to grieve in this context. Using an excellent metaphor of a boat and a dock, the long emotional process is described that immensely helps to normalize this lengthy emotional process so that women who have been abused see themselves as amazing and resilient. A look at how society disenfranchises this kind of grief by not really giving women victim-survivors of violence permission to grieve the way they need to grieve is reframed by noting it is important to remember that women don’t want the relationship to end; they simply want the abuse to end, thus frontline workers need to support women in this in-between place. It takes way more than weeks or months – it may take years to even start working on her grief. Anger is also looked at as anger manifests itself differently in the two parts of grieving and rebuilding. https://www.whenlovehurts.ca/2026/01/8-understanding-the-healing-journey/

02/10/2026

SHADE wants to thank the Red River Co-op for providing us with this $5000 monetary donation in support of Directed Empowerment. Today SHADE’s founder: Sherrie Winstanley, SHADE board member: Norm Mayer, and social work students: Njugio Ndegwa and Sarah Hubbard received the donation from the lovely Alyssa Cost who is the Community Partnership and Event Coordinator at Coop. We appreciate all your support!

02/09/2026

Podcast 7: Mothering, post-separation abuse, and the legal system -
Women’s experiences post-separation and of the legal system. Exploring the deeply ingrained belief that a man can be abusive to a woman and still be a “good father.” The difference between “repair parenting” and ‘counter-parenting.” Parental Alienation (PA) has been disavowed by the World Health Organization [WHO] as a valid diagnosis. PA operates as a powerful distraction tactic that discredits women’s abuse claims while positioning abusive men as victims. Men are seen as having rights to their children yet have no requirements to be safe, active, and connected fathers. Often, the legal system removes the right of women to protect their own child(ren). Children are safer and more supported when mothers are safer and more supported. Good co-parenting should look like collaboration, respectful communication, joint decision-making, goals that provide consistency for children, mutual respect – this is impossible when the man who is abusive believes he is central, superior, and deserving (Podcast 5). https://www.whenlovehurts.ca/2025/12/7-mothering-post-separation-abuse-legal-system/

02/06/2026

Podcast 6: The harms of help
Shockingly, through their research and work, the authors name the negative experiences women have with the very people and services meant to support them. Harmful responses to disclosures of abuse ignore the abuse, embolden the abusive partner, compound the harms of abuse, and increase women’s isolation. Misguided counsellors also entrap women. Dominant discourses in our culture exposes how this happens. One misguided belief people too often hold is that women don’t have boundaries. This couldn’t be farther from the truth! Someone who is abusive is trying to get rid of your boundaries and tries through many different means. Yet, people who are safe have no interest in violating your boundaries. Service providers, family and friends need to be sensitive to their position and the power of their voice lest they further harm vulnerable women victim-survivors of abuse. Women know when things don’t feel okay. The anchor of truth can be within us. Women need to trust themselves. If a service feels wrong, unsafe, judgmental, or disbelieving, you are entitled to walk away. https://www.whenlovehurts.ca/2025/12/6-harms-of-help/

02/03/2026

Podcast 5: Why abusive men are abusive -
There are many explanations offered for why abusive men are abusive. All are inaccurate. This podcast explores the true cause of abuse: the man’s underlying belief system. Actions reveal beliefs. Marriage counseling does NOT work in abusive relationships. The counseling must be focused on the abuse. Research shows that there are very few men invested in changing their belief system. A better focus for anyone working with either victim-survivors of abuse or men who are abusive is to ask, ‘Are women safer?’ and hold women’s (and their children’s) safety as what he is accountable for. Hearing this podcast for the first time may be revolutionary for you. https://www.whenlovehurts.ca/2025/12/5-why-abusive-men-abusive/

01/30/2026

Podcast 4: The Impacts of Abuse for Women - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=waXljJDI6pQ
This episode centres the impact of his abuse on her. Focusing on impacts shifts the focus from ‘What is wrong with her?’ to ‘What happened to her?’ At the top of the list of impacts are FEAR and unpredictability. Too often, fear gets misdiagnosed as a mental health problem such as anxiety or paranoia. We need to be asking, ‘What’s going on at home?’ Service providers need to listen and learn how to name many, many impacts of abuse. There is a connection between domestic violence, mental health, and substance abuse, however, we need to understand that men’s violence precedes mental health and substance abuse. Victim-survivors of woman abuse are incredibly brave!

01/26/2026

Podcast 3: Understanding the Power and Control Wheel. Abuse is about intention, impact, and a clear pattern, one rooted in power and control. This power and control wheel looks as not only physical abuse. Verbal, financial, social, spiritual, sexual, cultural, using the children are each forms of abuse. Post-separation abuse can also include litigation and social media abuse. What is important when assessing someone’s behaviour is to ask, ‘What is the intention behind it?’ and ‘What is the impact of it?’ https://www.whenlovehurts.ca/2025/12/3-understanding-power-control-wheel/

01/23/2026

Podcast 2: Cycle of Abuse
The cycle of abuse is a 3-phase repetitive pattern of behaviour that men who are abusive demonstrate in their intimate relationships. It starts with the “Honeymoon” phase, cycles to the “Tension-building” phase, and escalates to the “Explosion” phase – only to repeat the cycle. The cycle continues post-separation, only in different ways of expression. This podcast gives insight into how men who are abusers operate and why they operate as they do. Not only do abusers ‘honeymoon’ their victims, they honeymoon professionals, which makes it incredibly difficult for victim-survivors to be believed and receive the help they so desperately need. https://www.whenlovehurts.ca/2025/11/episode-2-understanding-the-cycle-of-abuse/

01/19/2026

Informative 8-series podcast help any woman affected by woman abuse, also known as domestic violence and gender-based violence. Podcast 1 aims to help understanding to what has been happening to abused women to help feel less crazy, less shame, and less alone. The language we use around this topic is extremely important. Language should be framed around ‘Who is hurting?’ and ‘Who is doing the abuse?’ The goal is for victim-survivors of abuse to feel that they can disclose what is happening to them and reach out to receive helpful support and resources, without being made to feel responsible and shamed. Those messages simply shut us down. Women are juggling much and do not need to be “damned if they do and damned if they don’t.”

Address

PO Box 49117 GARDEN CITY
Winnipeg, MB
R2V4G8

Website

http://www.shadewinnipeg.org/

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