12/30/2021
Last week, shortly before Christmas, Kevin and I jumped into a new role for the woman who lives in our domestic violence unit. We’ve become close with her. We know her children. They know us. The middle one knows I don’t mess around when it comes to bed time.
We were not expecting this when we began Peace For All of Us. We thought we’d provide housing and end of story. What we have learned in the last 12 months:
1. Women need MORE than housing. They need support. They need money and funding. They need their emotional and mental health needs to be met. They need more than one house can give.
2. These humans are lonely. (Kevin and I are the emergency contacts at all the kids’ schools). They often leave everything behind to escape violence. They are terrified.
We went to her house because her ex partner found out where she lived. He had attempted to enter her dwelling on more than one occasion. She needed our help to file a protective order.
So, we went and watched her children. Kevin drove her to and from the law courts. She was incredibly grateful.
It turns out, this week I was feeling sorry for myself. I had a lot on the go and was feeling overwhelmed. But spending an evening in this space, seeing how grateful she was, and how amazing her kids were... this helped wake me up.
I’m incredibly grateful to live the life I do. And can’t imagine walking in her shoes. Even for a day. But yet, she manages a smile. And incredible strength that I wish she didn’t have to bare.
She didn’t get the protective order that night. The judge dismissed her fear, anxiety, and desperation. He, a middle aged white man, told her to “call victim services.”
She was unbelievably graceful with the outcome. And unsurprised.
We still receive regular calls and texts about her being terrified. We feel helpless. Winnipeg and Manitoba, we need to do more.
Nahanni Fontaine
