11/09/2026
“I don’t work. But I have a full-time job taking care of my child with autism.
Every morning, I go to school with my son and stay with him throughout the day. I help him understand what is happening around him, support him when he struggles and make sure he can participate in class.
People sometimes ask me what I do for work. I tell them I am a mother. Taking care of my son is a full-time job.
When he was one, I noticed he was different from other children. He would line up his toys instead of playing with them, and he didn’t react to things the way other children did. I didn’t understand why.
At the hospital, I was told that my son was autistic. I was shocked. I knew very little about autism and had no idea how to raise or educate a child with a disability.
We were living in Gaselo, Wangdue, where I had no access to counselling or therapy. For months, I stopped going out and talking to people. I stayed home with my child while silently struggling with depression.
There were times when I was afraid I might lose my temper. Sometimes, I would leave my son with his sister and go for long walks while listening to music. Watching comedy shows helped me take my mind off things. I would also chant mani when I felt overwhelmed.
My son had difficult moments too. Sometimes he would cry uncontrollably, hit, bite or hurt himself. He could not speak for a long time and couldn’t tell me when he was hungry or ask for what he needed. It broke my heart because I didn’t know how to help him.
I slowly realised that if I wanted to take care of my family, I also had to take care of myself. I started going out more often and taking my son with me. Seeing him happy gave me hope.
When he was nine, I heard about Changangkha Middle Secondary School in Thimphu, an inclusive school for children with different needs. So, I left our home in Wangdue and moved to Thimphu with him.
Around the same time, I learned about Phensem, a network supporting parents and families of children with disabilities. At first, I thought it was a group for children. But after attending a few meetings, I realised it was also a place for parents and caregivers.
For the first time, I had somewhere I could talk about my life, cry, receive counselling and simply be heard.
Through Phensem, I learned about visual cards, simple pictures that help children communicate and understand everyday activities. For the first time, my son had a way to show me what he needed.
I used the cards to teach him how to use the toilet and practise basic hygiene. He still has things to learn, such as bathing independently and understanding good and bad touch, but the cards have helped us take important steps forward.
I learned to make the cards myself and began making them for other parents too. I also joined an entrepreneurship programme with a friend. With support from Phensem, we presented our idea and won first prize.
My family has supported me as much as they could. My husband is a teacher and works full-time. He often comes home exhausted, so much of the responsibility for caring for our son falls on me. I have learned to ask for support and to recognise that caregivers need care too.
Through Phensem, I have learned that I am not alone. I have received training and support to help my son become more independent, while learning to take care of myself along the way.”
Caregivers play a vital role in the lives of children with disabilities, often carrying an emotional and psychological burden that goes unseen. With The PEMA , Sherig Bhutan and UNICEF , let’s envision a world where caregivers are supported, understood and appreciated.
If you or someone you know is going through a similar experience, please seek support. Call 1098
Phensem Parents Support Group, Bhutan
