30/09/2026
This blog from a surrendering mum highlights a major issue.
If you come across a stray and decide to give it a home, it’s a choice you have made.
Being gifted an animal is having that choice taken away from you. You are being made to feel responsible for something that you had no say in.
Do not gift pets!
I responded to a surrender request this morning and only asked that the lady tell her story do I could share it.
I had it by this afternoon!
These buns will be here Sunday.
Please take note what your idea of a "great gift idea" is in reality.
I don't need to say any more.
Why Pets Should Never Be Given as Gifts
A puppy with a bow around its neck. A kitten under the Christmas tree. A pair of rabbits as a birthday surprise.
It can seem like the perfect gift. But unlike almost anything else we give someone, an animal isn’t a present that can be returned, exchanged or quietly put away when life changes.
It is a commitment that can last for many years.
And when the person receiving that animal wasn’t involved in the decision, we aren’t simply giving them a pet. We are giving them a responsibility they never agreed to take on.
A Gift I Never Asked For
In 2023, I was given two mini lop rabbits for my birthday.
I hadn’t asked for rabbits. At the time, I already had two cats, which meant that overnight I went from being responsible for two animals to four.
But I love animals, and once the rabbits were mine, I felt responsible for giving them the best life I possibly could.
I named them Thumper and Toffee. I had them desexed, microchipped and vaccinated. I paid for their food, housing and veterinary care. They became part of our family, they even have their own Christmas decorations on our tree.
Not long after receiving them, I fell pregnant with our first child.
Life changed dramatically, but the responsibility of four animals didn’t.
Love Doesn’t Pay the Vet Bills
This is something I wish people considered before giving someone an animal.
The purchase or adoption price is only the beginning.
There is food, bedding, housing, vaccinations, desexing, microchipping, veterinary check-ups and unexpected medical expenses. Depending on the animal, that financial commitment can continue for 10 years or more.
For a long time, I simply made it work.
But over the past year, as the cost of living and our household expenses increased, things became harder. Bills kept coming, and eventually I had to admit something I had been avoiding:
I couldn’t continue giving four animals the level of care I believed they deserved.
My rabbits’ vaccination and check-up became overdue. I kept telling myself I would get to it when there was a little more money left over, but another expense would always come first.
That brings with it an enormous amount of guilt.
The Guilt of Rehoming a Pet
I have always believed that when you take on an animal, you take responsibility for them for life.
So considering surrendering my rabbits went against something I strongly believed in.
I feel guilty because I love them.
I feel guilty because they trust me.
I feel guilty because I worry that surrendering them means I have failed them.
But there was another truth I had to acknowledge: I hadn’t chosen to take on this responsibility in the first place.
Someone else had made that decision for me.
They gave me the animals with good intentions, but they couldn’t possibly have known what my finances, family or life would look like several years later.
And that is exactly why animals shouldn’t be surprise gifts.
A Pet Is a Personal Decision
Choosing to bring an animal into your family should involve researching the species, understanding the costs, considering your living arrangements and deciding whether you can realistically commit to caring for that animal for its entire life.
The future owner needs to be part of that decision.
Do they have other pets?
Can they afford routine and emergency veterinary care?
Does their home suit the animal?
Are they planning children, moving house or experiencing other major life changes?
Do they actually want that particular animal?
These aren’t questions that should be answered on somebody else’s behalf.
Sometimes Rehoming Is the Responsible Choice
There is also so much shame attached to surrendering an animal.
Of course, taking on a pet should never be treated casually. But there is a difference between abandoning an animal when it becomes inconvenient and recognising that you can no longer provide the life it deserves.
Sometimes loving an animal means admitting that another home may be able to give them more than you currently can.
That doesn’t make the decision painless.
In my case, trying to find somewhere safe for Thumper and Toffee has been incredibly stressful. Rescue organisations are overwhelmed. Some surrender options involve fees, while others require vaccinations to be completely up to date. Expenses that can be difficult for someone who is surrendering precisely because they are struggling financially.
You can end up feeling trapped between knowing you cannot continue and desperately wanting to make sure your animals end up somewhere safe.
If You Want to Give Someone a Pet, Give Them the Choice
If someone has talked about wanting a pet, there are still beautiful ways to make that happen without surprising them with a living animal.
Tell them you would love to pay an adoption fee when they’re ready. Take them to meet animals at a rescue. Buy the enclosure, bed or supplies once they have chosen their pet themselves.
Make the gift helping them get the animal they have chosen, rather than choosing the animal for them.
Because a pet might be presented as a gift on one particular day, but the responsibility continues every single day afterwards.
Thumper and Toffee were given to me with good intentions, and they have been loved.
But if I could change one thing, it would be that the decision to bring them into my life had been mine to make.
Animals aren’t gifts. They are commitments and the person making that commitment should always get to say yes.
