13/02/2024
"When you forgive someone who has wronged you, you are free from bitterness and resentment that can saturate your soul like toxic waste." ~Candace Cameron Bure
I’m sure you get tired of seeing all the “forgive and forget” posts. I do too. How are you supposed to forgive someone when you can’t forget? When the hurt is still all too real? Forgiveness is something I really struggle with, but there are a few things we must remember...
Peter tells us that they “hurled” insults at Jesus. Of all the words he could have used here, he chose that word. It is no coincidence. Their words were meant to hurt Jesus. His body was already broken physically, so their words were meant to break Him down emotionally, mentally, and even spiritually. How did Jesus retaliate? He didn’t. Luke tells us that He, in His agonizing pain, chose to intercede for them. Bloody, beaten, dying. He likely struggled to even take a breath, but He chose to speak. Not in contempt, but in intercession, saying “Father, forgive them...” The very same people that put Him on that cross were the people He was dying to save... just like us. I know it is easy to say, “Well, I am not Jesus”. Very true.
Jesus died on the cross, not just for you to have the opportunity to be in Heaven with Him one day, but also for that person you are holding that grudge against to have the same opportunity as you. No matter what you have done in the past, His love and grace allow you to have a second chance. His grace is abundant, it is not selective. After He was brutally beaten, mocked, and hung on the cross, Jesus chose to say, “Father, forgive them...” He did not hate them. He didn’t retaliate or plot His revenge. As we saw earlier, He intervened on their behalf. He asked His Father in Heaven to forgive them after all the horrible and merciless things they had done to Him. That is the love of God, the love He has for all of us, and the love we should have for others.
Forgiveness is when you give up resentment and it is replaced with relief. It is a very powerful act and an expression of love. Forgiveness is critical to being happy and having a healthy relationship with God. Allowing ourselves to forgive someone is sometimes an extremely difficult thing to do, but holding onto that grudge and storing that anger, bitterness, sadness, and pain in our hearts only hurts us, and it eventually causes us to drift from God. When we are so preoccupied with holding onto that grudge and bitterness, we can’t give our whole heart to Him. As humans, we think forgiveness makes us look weak, but as Christians, we know it makes us stronger because we are growing closer to God.
Everyone says, “forgive and forget”. We are supposed to forgive others, it’s what God has commanded us to do. Forgiving allows us to move on, let go of that grudge and that pain, and grow closer to God. Unfortunately, forgetting means we completely forget about the pain that was inflicted on us and allow ourselves to go back to the way things were. This allows others to continuously treat us the way they did before and hurt us again and again. It is okay to protect yourself. Instead of “forgive and forget”, we should “let go and let God”. Let go of that grudge and work through that pain, and let God take over your heart, your whole heart. Let God take over your life. Forgiving allows us to obtain that sense of relief and relinquish our grasp on the bitterness and anger, ultimately bringing us closer to God. God’s love for us is immeasurable, and through Him, our love for others shouldn’t have a limit either. In Matthew 18, Peter asks Jesus how many times he should forgive someone who sins against him, saying, “…should it be seven times?”. Jesus responds saying, “No, not seven times… but seventy times seven”.
“Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tender hearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.”~ Ephesians 4:31-32