sober couple support group

07/22/2024

good morning everyone. I'm looking for some work this morning anyone have anything in the Biddeford area? yard work anything would be appreciated. thanks in advance and God bless you all

07/17/2024

NEED HELP ASAP!!!! MY WIFE AND I ARE FEELING TREATHEND BY THIS STORM ANYONE WILLING TO HELP US GET A CHEAP MITEL ROOM PLEASE HELP US WERE IN OUR TENT BEHIND THE CEMETERY ON WEST STREET GOD BLESS YOU ALL AND BE SAFE😞😞🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

06/13/2024

LIVING OUR AMENDS

“Years of living with an alcoholic is almost sure to make any wife or child neurotic. The entire family is, to some extent, ill.”
— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 122

It is important for me to realize that, as an alcoholic, I not only hurt myself, but also those around me. Making amends to my family, and to the families of alcoholics still suffering, will always be important. Understanding the havoc I created and trying to repair the destruction, will be a lifelong endeavor. The example of my sobriety may give others hope, and faith to help themselves.

June 13, 2024
A full life
Page 171

"The program works a miracle in our lives...We become free to live."

Basic Text, p. 11

Most of us--if we've been in recovery for any length of time at all--have heard some member complaining in a meeting about being terribly overworked, too busy for meetings or sponsorship or other activities. In fact, we may have been the complaining member. The days seem so full: job, family and friends, meetings, activities, sponsorship, step work. "There just aren't enough hours in the day," the member complains, "to get everything done and meet everyone's demands on my time!"

When this happens, usually there's soft laughter from some of the other members--probably members who had planned to grumble about the same sort of thing. The laughter stems from our recognition that we are complaining about the miracle of the life that is ours today. Not so long ago, few of us were capable of having any of these "problems" in our life. We devoted all of our energy to maintaining our active addiction. Today we have full lives, complete with all the feelings and problems that go with living in reality.

Just for Today: I will remember that my life is a miracle. Instead of resenting how busy I am, I will be thankful my life is so full.

Copyright (c) 2007-2023, NA World Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved

06/11/2024

FAMILY OBLIGATIONS
. . a spiritual life which does not include . . . family obligations may not be so perfect after all.
— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 129

I can be doing great in the program—applying it at meetings, at work, and in service activities—and find that things have gone to pieces at home. I expect my loved ones to understand, but they cannot. I expect them to see and value my progress, but they don’t—unless I show them. Do I neglect their needs and desires for my attention and concern? When I’m around them, am I irritable or boring? Are my “amends” a mumbled “Sorry,” or do they take the form of patience and tolerance? Do I preach to them, trying to reform or “fix” them? Have I ever really cleaned house with them? “The spiritual life is not a theory. We have to live it” (Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 83).

June 11, 2024
Living clean
Page 169

"As we recover, we gain a new outlook on being clean...Life can become a new adventure for us."

Basic Text, p. 91

The using life is not a clean one--no one knows this better than we do. Some of us lived in physical squalor, caring neither for our surroundings nor ourselves. Worse, though, than any external filth was the way most of us felt inside. The things we did to get our drugs, the way we treated other people, and the way we treated ourselves had us feeling dirty. Many of us recall waking too many mornings just wishing that, for once, we could feel clean about our ourselves and our lives.

Today, we have a chance to feel clean by living clean. For us addicts, living clean starts with not using--after all, that's our primary use for the word "clean" in Narcotics Anonymous. But as we stay "clean" and work the Twelve Steps, we discover another kind of clean. It's the clean that comes from admitting the truth about our addiction rather than hiding or denying our disease. It's the freshness that comes from owning up to our wrongs and making amends for them. It's the vitality that comes from the new set of values we develop as we seek a Higher Power's will for us. When we practice the principles of our program in all our affairs, we have no reason to feel dirty about our lives or our lifestyles--we're living clean, and grateful to be doing so at last.

"Clean living" used to be just for the "squares." Today, living clean is the only way we'd have it.

Just for Today: I feel clean because I'm living clean--that's the way I want to keep it.

Copyright (c) 2007-2023, NA World Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved

06/10/2024

IMPATIENT? TRY LEVITATING

We reacted more strongly to frustrations than normal people.
— AS BILL SEES IT, p. 111

Impatience with other people is one of my principal failings. Following a slow car in a no-passing lane, or waiting in a restaurant for the check, drives me to distraction. Before I give God a chance to slow me down, I explode, and that’s what I call being quicker than God. That repeated experience gave me an idea. I thought if I could look down on these events from God’s point of view, I might better control my feelings and behavior. I tried it and when I encountered the next slow driver, I levitated and looked down on the other car and upon myself. I saw an elderly couple driving along, happily chatting about their grandchildren. They were followed by me—bug-eyed and red of face—who had no time schedule to meet anyway. I looked so silly that I dropped back into reality and slowed down. Seeing things from God’s angle of vision can be very relaxing.

June 10, 2024
Changing motives
Page 168

"When we finally get our own selfish motives out of the way, we begin to find a peace that we never imagined possible."

Basic Text, p. 45

As we examine our beliefs, our actions, and our motives in recovery, we'll find that sometimes we do things for the wrong reasons. In our early recovery, we may have spent a great deal of money and time on people, wanting only for them to like us. Later on, we may find that we still spend money on people, but our motives have changed. We do it because we like them. Or perhaps we used to get romantically involved because we felt hollow inside and were seeking fulfillment through another person. Now our reasons for romantic involvement are based in a desire to share our already rewarding lives with an equal partner. Maybe we used to work the steps because we were afraid we'd relapse if we didn't. Today we work the steps because we want to grow spiritually.

We have a new purpose in life today, and our changing motives reflect that. We have so much more to offer than our neediness and insecurities. We have developed a wholesomeness of spirit and a peace of mind that moves our recovery into a new realm. We extend our love and share our recovery with complete generosity, and the difference we make is the legacy we leave to those who have yet to join us.

Just for Today: In recovery, my motives have changed. I want to do things for the right reason, not just for my personal benefit. Today, I will examine my motives.

Copyright (c) 2007-2023, NA World Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved

06/09/2024

LIVING IN THE NOW

First, we try living in the now just in order to stay sober—and it works. Once the idea has become a part of our thinking, we find that living life in 24-hour segments is an effective and satisfying way to handle many other matters as well.
— LIVING SOBER, p. 7

“One Day At A Time.” To a newcomer this and other one-liners of A.A. may seem ridiculous. The passwords of the A.A. Fellowship can become lifelines in moments of stress. Each day can be like a rose unfurling according to the plan of a Power greater than myself. My program should be planted in the right location, just as it will need to be groomed, nourished, and protected from disease. My planting will require patience, and my realizing that some flowers will be more perfect than others. Each stage of the petals’ unfolding can bring wonder and delight if I do not interfere or let my expectations override my acceptance—and this brings serenity.

June 09, 2024
Old dreams needn't die
Page 167

"Lost dreams awaken and new possibilities arise."

Basic Text, p. 91

Most of us had dreams when we were young. Whether we dreamed of a dynamic career, a large and loving family, or travels abroad, our dreams died when our addiction took hold. Anything we ever wanted for ourselves was cast away in our pursuit of drugs. Our dreams didn't go beyond the next drug and the euphoria we hoped it would bring.

Now in recovery, we find a reason to hope that our lost dreams could still come true. No matter how old we are, how much our addiction has taken from us, or how unlikely it may seem, our freedom from active addiction gives us the freedom to pursue our ambitions. We may discover that we're very talented at something, or find a hobby we love, or learn that continuing our education can bring remarkable rewards.

We used to put most of our energy into spinning excuses and rationalizations for our failures. Today, we go forward and make use of the many opportunities life presents to us. We may be amazed at what we're capable of. With our foundation of recovery, success, fulfillment, and satisfaction are within our reach at last.

Just for Today: Starting today, I'll do whatever I can to realize my dreams.

Copyright (c) 2007-2023, NA World Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved

06/08/2024

Bethany Dennison

06/08/2024

06/08/2024

OPENING UP TO CHANGE

Self-searching is the means by which we bring new vision, action, and grace to bear upon the dark and negative side of our natures. With it comes the development of that kind of humility that makes it possible for us to receive God’s help. . . . we find that bit by bit we can discard the old life—the one that did not work—for a new life that can and does work under any conditions whatever.
— AS BILL SEES IT, pp. 10, 8

I have been given a daily reprieve contingent upon my spiritual condition, provided I seek progress, not perfection. To become ready for change, I practice willingness, opening myself to possibilities of change. If I realize there are defects that hinder my usefulness in A.A. and toward others, I become ready by meditating and receiving direction. “Some of us have tried to hold on to our old ideas and the result was nil until we let go absolutely” (Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 58). To let go and let God, I need only surrender my old ways to Him; I no longer fight nor do I try to control, but simply believe that, with God’s help, I am changed and affirming this belief makes me ready. I empty myself to be full of awareness, light, and love, and I am ready to face each day with hope.

June 08, 2024
The only requirement
Page 166

"This program offers hope. All you have to bring with you is the desire to stop using and the willingness to try this new way of life."

IP No. 16, "For the Newcomer"

From time to time we wonder if we're "doing it right" in Narcotics Anonymous. Are we attending enough meetings? Are we using our sponsor, or working the steps, or speaking, or reading, or living the "right" way? We value the fellowship of recovering addicts--we don't know what we'd do without it. What if the way we're practicing our program is "wrong"? Does that make us "bad" NA members?

We can settle our insecurities by reviewing our Third tradition, which assures us that "the only requirement for membership is a desire to stop using." There aren't any rules that say we've got to attend this many meetings or these particular meetings, or work the "steps" this way at this pace, or live our lives to suit these people in order to remain NA members in good standing.

It's true that, if we want the kind of recovery we see in members we respect, we'll want to practice the kind of program that's made their recovery possible. But NA is a fellowship of freedom; we work the program the best way for us, not for someone else. The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop using.

Just for Today: I will look at the program I'm working in light of my own recovery. I will practice that program to the best of my ability.

Copyright (c) 2007-2023, NA World Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved

06/07/2024

LONG-TERM HOPE

Since most of us are born with an abundance of natural desires, it isn’t strange that we often let these far exceed their intended purpose. When they drive us blindly, or we willfully demand that they supply us with more satisfactions or pleasures than are possible or due us, that is the point at which we depart from the degree of perfection that God wishes for us here on earth. That is the measure of our character defects, or, if you wish, of our sins.
— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 65

This is where long-term hope is born and perspective is gained, both of the nature of my illness and the path of my recovery. The beauty of A.A. lies in knowing that my life, with God’s help, will improve. The A.A. journey becomes richer, the understanding becomes truth, the dreams become realities—and today becomes forever.
As I step into the A.A. light, my heart fills with the presence of God.

June 07, 2024
Someone who believes in me
Page 165

"Just for today, I will have faith in someone in NA who believes in me and wants to help me in my recovery."

Basic Text, p. 100

Not all of us arrive in NA and automatically stay clean. But if we keep coming back, we find in Narcotics Anonymous the support we need for our recovery. Staying clean is easier when we have someone who believes in us even when we don't believe in ourselves.

Even the most frequent relapser in NA usually has one staunch supporter who is always there, no matter what. It is imperative that we find that one person or group of people who believes in us. When we ask them if we will ever get clean, they will always reply, "Yes, you can and you will. Just keep coming back!"

We all need someone who believes in us, especially when we can't believe in ourselves. When we relapse, we undermine our already shattered self-confidence, sometimes so badly that we begin to feel utterly hopeless. At such times, we need the support of our loyal NA friends. They tell us that this can be our last relapse. They know from experience that if we keep coming to meetings, we will eventually get clean and stay clean.

It's hard for many of us to believe in ourselves. But when someone loves us unconditionally, offering support no matter how many times we've relapsed, recovery in NA becomes a little more real for us.

Just for Today: I will find someone who believes in me. I will believe in them.

Copyright (c) 2007-2023, NA World Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved

06/06/2024

June 06, 2024
Recovery doesn't happen overnight
Page 164

"The Twelve Steps of Narcotics Anonymous are a progressive recovery process established in our daily living."

Basic Text, p. 99

After some time in recovery, we may find we are faced with what seem like overwhelming personal problems, angry feelings, and despair. When we realize what's going on, we may wail, "But I've been working so hard. I thought I was..." Recovered, maybe? Not hardly. Over and over, we hear that recovery is an ongoing process and that we are never cured. Yet we sometimes believe that if we just work our steps enough, pray enough, or go to enough meetings, we'll eventually . . . Well, maybe not be cured, but be something!

And we are "something." We're recovering--recovering from active addiction. No matter what we've dealt with through the process of the steps, there will always be more. What we didn't remember or didn't think was important in our first inventory will surely present itself later on. Again and again, we'll turn to the process of the steps to deal with what's bothering us. The more we use this process the more we'll trust it, for we can see the results. We go from anger and resentment to forgiveness, from denial to honesty and acceptance, and from pain to serenity.

Recovery doesn't happen overnight, and ours will never be complete. But each day brings new healing and the hope for more tomorrow.

Just for Today: I will do what I can for my recovery today and maintain hope in the ongoing process of recovery.

Copyright (c) 2007-2023, NA World Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved

ALL WE DO IS TRY

Can He now take them all—every one?
— ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 76

In doing Step Six it helped me a lot to remember that I am striving for “spiritual progress.” Some of my character defects may be with me for the rest of my life, but most have been toned down or eliminated. All that Step Six asks of me is to become willing to name my defects, claim them as my own, and be willing to discard the ones I can, just for today. As I grow in the program, many of my defects become more objectionable to me than previously and, therefore, I need to repeat Step Six so that I can become happier with myself and maintain my serenity.

05/06/2024

“HOLD BACK NOTHING”

The real tests of the situation are your own willingness to confide and your full confidence in the one with whom you share your first accurate self-survey. . . . Provided you hold back nothing, your sense of relief will mount from minute to minute. The dammed-up emotions of years break out of their confinement, and miraculously vanish as soon as they are exposed. As the pain subsides, a healing tranquility takes its place.
— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, pp. 61-62

A tiny kernel of locked-in feelings began to unfold when I first attended A.A. meetings and self-knowledge then became a learning task for me. This new self-understanding brought about a change in my responses to life’s situations. I realized I had the right to make choices in my life, and the inner dictatorship of habits slowly lost its grip.
I believe that if I seek God I can find a better way to live and I ask Him daily to assist me in living a sober life.

May 06, 2024
Are we having fun yet?
Page 132

"In time, we can relax and enjoy the atmosphere of recovery."

Basic Text, p. 56

Imagine what would happen if a newcomer walked into one of our meetings and was met by a group of grim-faced people gripping the arms of their chairs with white knuckles. That newcomer would probably bolt, perhaps muttering, "I thought I could get off drugs and be happy."

Thankfully, our newcomers are usually met by a group of friendly, smiling folks who are obviously fairly content with the lives they've found in Narcotics Anonymous. What an enormous amount of hope this provides! A newcomer, whose life has been deadly serious, is strongly attracted by an atmosphere of laughter and relaxation. Coming from a place where everything is taken seriously, where disaster always waits around the next corner, it's a welcome relief to enter a room and find people who generally don't take themselves too seriously, who are ready for something wonderful.

We learn to lighten up in recovery. We laugh at the absurdity of our addiction. Our meetings--those rooms filled with the lively, happy sounds of percolating coffee, clattering chairs, and laughing addicts--are the gathering places where we first welcome our newcomers and let them know that, yes, we're having fun now.

Just for Today: I can laugh at myself. I can take a joke. I will lighten up and have some fun today.

Copyright (c) 2007-2023, NA World Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved