Stand Up to Trauma

12/20/2020

This year has been so much about grief, for my mom, for what we’ve all lost as a society with COVID, and most of all, it opened an unexpected floodgate.

This year was the first time I’ve grieved for all I’ve lost, all I’ve experience. I find myself having bursts of tears here and there — a release.

This year was the first fine I’ve grieved for all I’ve lost, all I’ve experienced. I find myself having bursts of tears here and there — a release.

05/06/2020

I still can’t let myself go there. I cant completely let myself acknowledge how deeply I’ve been hurt. I ignore the pit in my stomach until it goes away.
It’s too scary. What if I dive in and can’t find my way back?

Can anyone relate?
-Haylee

05/04/2020

I had this exact argument, I mean discussion, last night.
**e

05/02/2020

This resonates so, so much. What about for you?


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I was brought up on fairytales and happily ever afters. When my marriage broke down, I felt guilt and shame and I hadn’t even realised it was an abusive relationship. I had complex PTSD, depression, anxiety and self harm. I thought I was broken and needed fixing. In fact, I thought I needed a knight in shining armour to come swooping in on a white horse to fix and rescue me. What I didn’t realise was that I wasn’t broken, I was hurt. Hurt to the deepest core and I needed healing. That in fact my narcissist ex had actually done me the biggest favour as he had shone a massive spotlight on my deep inner child wounds of not feeling worthy or good enough. So I started my healing journey leading to Post traumatic growth. Living life in a higher level I never would have had I not lived through that trauma. So if you are feeling broken right now, I’m sending you love and strength because you are hurt and you just need healing ❤️

04/29/2020

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Healing is not a linear. Progress is not linear. You go through ups and down during this process. There are some days which are good and some days are bad. But that's okay. You got this. You are enough and you can do this❤️ 🎨- .eequay •
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04/27/2020

・・・
We look back at life and can remember the pivotal moments that have shaped who we have become.
What if the most pivotal moments are that of r**e, abuse, or being kidnapped and assaulted, what future does that hold? .
That is what many women ask when something like this happens to them. They feel shame, fear, guilt, anger, resentment, self destruction, broken, unlovable, and ugly, to say the least. .
The movement was a moment of courage for many. It was a movement that says you are not alone, you are heard, we will stand together, and we will make a difference. .
We may not be able to stop bad people from doing bad things, but we deter them, we can fight back, we can show them that if they do something like this, it will be met with an army of people standing beside them, fighting for the right to pivotal moments in life that are filled with hope. .
Although the tabloids are not flooded with it still needs attention paid to what it stands for. As sexual assault awareness month is ending don’t let it fade from your mind but rather get involved in the battle against it. For more information about how you can get involved, please DM us today. .

04/12/2020

April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month.
I’ve made great progress in the past year and for that I am grateful. This journey wouldn’t have been possible without my amazing support system. -Haylee

https://www.standuptotrauma.com/blog/thankyou

**e

04/08/2020

This one hits for me, what about you?


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Lack of empathy is one of the biggest traits of a narcissist. I remember many times when I was literally sitting on the floor crying and my ex would look at me with zero emotion like he was watching paint dry!! I remember feeling worthless and that it must be my fault as to why he was treating me like that. If never crossed my mind that it was him not me because I had unhealed er child wounds of codependency.
Tell me your stories of crying in front of your ex and how they reacted?

Hashtags
**e

03/19/2020

This.


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How many friends or family members told you to just get over it or move on? They have no clue what emotional abuse is! .

03/18/2020

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💯🎯🙏🏼✨

03/17/2020

ℹ🌿THE 4Fs: A TRAUMA TYPOLOGY IN COMPLEX PTSD |

BY PETE WALKER

This paper describes a trauma typology for differentially diagnosing and treating Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. This model elaborates four basic defensive structures that develop out of our instinctive Fight, Flight, Freeze and Fawn responses to severe abandonment and trauma (heretofore referred to as the 4Fs).

Variances in the childhood abuse/neglect pattern, birth order, and genetic predispositions result in individuals "choosing" and specializing in narcissistic (fight), obsessive/compulsive (flight), dissociative (freeze) or codependent (fawn) defenses.

Many of my clients have reported that psychoeducation in this model has been motivational, deshaming and pragmatically helpful in guiding their recovery.

Individuals who experience "good enough parenting" in childhood arrive in adulthood with a healthy and flexible response repertoire to danger. In the face of real danger, they have appropriate access to all of their 4F choices.

Easy access to the fight response insures good boundaries, healthy assertiveness and aggressive self-protectiveness if necessary. Untraumatized individuals also easily and appropriately access their flight instinct and disengage and retreat when confrontation would exacerbate their danger.

They also freeze appropriately and give up and quit struggling when further activity or resistance is futile or counterproductive. And finally they also fawn in a liquid, "play-space" manner and are able to listen, help, and compromise as readily as they assert and express themselves and their needs, rights and points of view.

Those who are repetitively traumatized in childhood however, often learn to survive by over-relying on the use of one or two of the 4F Reponses. Fixation in any one 4F response not only delimits the ability to access all the others, but also severely impairs the individual's ability to relax into an undefended state, circumscribing him in a very narrow, impoverished experience of life.

Over time a habitual 4F defense also "serves" to distract the individual from the accumulating unbearable feelings of her current alienation and unresolved past trauma.

READ ARTICLE HERE ⬇️
http://pete-walker.com/fourFs_TraumaTypologyComplexPTSD.htm

Image by Take a look at Beth Wilson ():

03/14/2020

Many have been ensnared by the initial charms of a narcissist, yet few have benefited from a long-term relationship with one. The idealization phase with a narcissist includes love bombing, sweeping a victim off his or her feet, and empty, flowery promises...