01/27/2025
Parents of children fighting pediatric cancer become members of a “club” they didn’t ask for or want to join. In this club, we find community through our shared struggles and the overwhelming loneliness of these everyday battles. We share in the loneliness that comes with missing milestones like back to school, playdates, vacations, birthdays, holidays. But this membership is also one of individual and singular loneliness specific to each parent. Every family, every child, every experience is unique.
This loneliness is the rollercoaster of heightened fear, anxiety, hope, joy, sadness, desperation that leads to uncertainty with every life-changing decision we must make for our child. The weight of not knowing whether our decision for a medication, procedure or trial is “finally” going to work or will it have an adverse reaction. This loneliness is also anger, very real anger. Anger, that this wasn’t the plan for our lives or the plan for our child. And anger, that the world and everyone around us, selfishly continue to move forward, while your child’s world is on pause. Anger and fear, not knowing if this pause is temporary or definite.
In these moments of loneliness, friends and family, may unintentionally be overwhelming with their well-meaning ways of providing or showing support, or sharing of their own feelings. While we are appreciative and understanding, sometimes it adds to the heavy load parents already carry.
The children's book "The Rabbit Listened" serves as a reminder of the importance of empathy and the compassionate act of listening. Rather than trying to fix the situation, simply being present and listening can be exactly what is needed. As families navigate this difficult journey, they ask their loved ones to "Be the Rabbit" and offer support through understanding and quiet presence.