06/06/2026
๐ซ ๐๐จ๐ง๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ข๐ซ๐ฌ: ๐๐ฎ๐ฅ๐๐ฌ & ๐๐จ๐ง๐ค๐๐ฒ๐ฌ. ๐ซ
What to do when one of your bonded animals passes away and leaves its bonded mate behind.
โ ๐๐ก๐๐ญ ๐๐จ๐๐ฌ ๐ โ๐๐จ๐ง๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ข๐ซโ ๐ฆ๐๐๐ง โ
Mules and donkeys can form incredibly strong bonds with each other. They often form deep attachments to an equine that is; similar in personality, complimentary of their personality, or simply from living with and/or working with a particular equine for a long time. These bonded pairs often become inseparable and rely on one another for comfort and peace. In particular: mules and donkeys are often more dependent of each other and more likely to form intensely strong bonds compared to horses. And it is INCREDIBLY hard on them to lose their bonded mate. At least for a whileโฆ
So to preface this- Iโll start by clearly stating:
๐จ ๐ ๐๐จ ๐๐๐ ๐ฌ๐ฎ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐จ๐ซ๐ญ ๐๐จ๐ฆ๐ฉ๐๐ง๐ข๐จ๐ง ๐๐ฎ๐ญ๐ก๐๐ง๐๐ฌ๐ข๐. ๐จ
Myself, other long-ear enthusiasts/advocates, and (so far) every equine/large animal vet I have discussed this with personally- do not support companion euthanasia simply for the sake of one of the bonded animals passing.
It is one thing to euthanize a bonded pair because they are; both unwell, both very old and you have no other equines for them and do not want to relinquish the surviving equine to someone else, or other unique situations-
But it is NOT fair to euthanize a healthy mule/donkey SOLEY for the reason its bonded mate needs euthanasia/ has passed- and โyou donโt want to put the surviving mule/donkey through losing the other.โ
That often makes the PEOPLE feel better- but it is anthropomorphism and an unrealistic and unethical practice to advocate for.
Will the surviving mule/donkey be depressed for a while? ๐๐๐ฌ.
Will they need to grieve? ๐๐๐๐ข๐ง๐ข๐ญ๐๐ฅ๐ฒ.
Will they need extra support for a while? ๐๐ง๐๐จ๐ฎ๐๐ญ๐๐๐ฅ๐ฒ.
Will they eventually be able to THRIVE again? ๐๐๐ฌ๐จ๐ฅ๐ฎ๐ญ๐๐ฅ๐ฒ!!!
Itโs going to largely depend on what YOU do to help them navigate the extreme stress -and often depression- that comes from such a huge loss.
We have had bonded pairs lose their mate many times for many reasons, like these couple examples;
- Donkeys who were completely inseparable whose bonded mate passed away.
- Mules who were together for decades who got split up.
Be it death or human decision; we have been there for these animals that had to navigate loss.
And let me tell you- it is not always smooth sailing, but it is DOABLE. And often times it is more seamless than you may expect, especially after some initial stages. And no- just because an animal is going through discomfort doesnโt make it cruel, it is part of life and the PURPOSE is for them to get through the difficult period to come out the other end HAPPY again!
Soโฆ what DO you do in these situations to help?
โค๏ธ ๐๐จ๐ฆ๐ ๐๐ญ๐๐ฉ๐ฌ ๐จ๐ ๐๐ฎ๐ฉ๐ฉ๐จ๐ซ๐ญ โค๏ธ
๐ Gastrogard/Ulcergard for the first week (or more depending on how the mule/donkey is doing) to combat ulcers from stress. It also doesnโt hurt to get some kaolin pectin in them too, as their manure can be loose while they are stressed. I personally do gastrogard in the morning while they have an emptier stomach, then the KP in the evening.
โฌ๏ธ ๐๐ฉ๐ช๐ด ๐ฑ๐ช๐ฆ๐ค๐ฆ ๐ฐ๐ง ๐ข๐ฅ๐ท๐ช๐ค๐ฆ ๐ช๐ด ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ข๐ด ๐ช๐ต ๐ค๐ข๐ฏ ๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ญ๐ฑ ๐ฑ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ท๐ฆ๐ฏ๐ต ๐ข๐ฏ ๐ถ๐ญ๐ค๐ฆ๐ณ-๐ณ๐ฆ๐ญ๐ข๐ต๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ค๐ฐ๐ญ๐ช๐ค!
๐ Keep them BUSY by allowing them to navigate dynamics with other equines, ideally in a herd setting. Make sure youโre being attentive: take a look at which equine(s) your mule/donkey are drawn to. Get them in an area with the equine(s) you think will be suitable as a companion(s) and allow them to figure out a dynamic.
๐ Keep them eating; maybe that means to encourage them theyโll need something a little more โfunโ in their diet. Maybe that is some alfalfa, maybe thatโs senior grain, maybe itโs a treat, but offer them something (in moderation) to get their brain with some โhappyโ stimulus.
๐ Work with them. Have them engage in something that requires thought and builds their confidence. Give them grace in how they navigate this- their world has just been flipped upside down! But donโt wallow as they need to move forward too.
๐ก ๐๐ก๐๐ญ ๐ญ๐๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฌ ๐ฒ๐จ๐ฎ ๐ญ๐ก๐๐ฒ ๐๐ซ๐ ๐ฌ๐ญ๐ซ๐ฎ๐ ๐ ๐ฅ๐ข๐ง๐ ?
๐ Calling out/braying, and searching for their friend. [If your mule/donkey is able to see their mateโs body it does help them grieve and understand what happened. This is not always doable but if it is and option for them- it is helpful.]
๐ Continuing old habits that they did with their mate; trying to follow old routines they had, keeping to โtheir hangout places,โ inappetence, slow/quieter demeanor, isolating from others
๐ก ๐๐ก๐๐ญ ๐ญ๐๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฌ ๐ฒ๐จ๐ฎ ๐ญ๐ก๐๐ฒ ๐๐ซ๐ ๐ข๐ฆ๐ฉ๐ซ๐จ๐ฏ๐ข๐ง๐ ?
๐ Involving themselves with other equine(s), working out/participating in herd dynamics
๐ Exploring/grazing
๐ Making new routines (ie; new โhangout spots,โ eating with different equines, etc)
๐ Engaging in their โworkโ with a good demeanor
Losing an animal is always hard- and the heartbreak doubles when itโs the loss of a bonded animal- but it doesnโt have to stay a tragedy. With a little work, a little dedication, and a lot of love- ๐ข๐ญ ๐๐๐ง ๐ ๐๐ญ ๐๐๐ญ๐ญ๐๐ซ ๐
