Peacing Out

Peacing Out No frills, just compassionate, feminist care on death, dying, grief and life cycles. Empowering you to make decisions for life and end of life.

While the process of accessing Medical Aid in Dying (MAID) may be clinical, the journey to receive support and care shou...
02/20/2026

While the process of accessing Medical Aid in Dying (MAID) may be clinical, the journey to receive support and care should never be.

The path to making this choice is not always easy, and it deserves compassion, dignity, and wholehearted support every step of the way.

On February 6, 2026, Governor Kathy Hochul signed the Medical Aid in Dying Act into law, making New York the 14th U.S. jurisdiction to legalize Death with Dignity. The law will take effect on August 5, 2026.

This milestone comes after more than a decade of tireless advocacy by New Yorkers living with terminal illnesses, grieving families, clinicians, and supporters across the state. Twenty-nine advocates died while waiting for MAID to become legal and accessible. We are deeply grateful for the energy, courage, and unwavering belief they brought to this movement for choice, dignity, and compassionate care. Thank you for your advocacy.

This legislation marks a significant step forward in protecting freedom of choice in end-of-life care. At the same time, the finalized 2026 New York law remains highly restrictive compared to some international models (see slide outlining New York State “guardrails” for details). Continued advocacy will be essential to ensure access for those living with prolonged, debilitating illness, as the six-month prognosis requirement and self-administration provision may limit eligibility. The choice to avoid a prolonged and unwanted dying process should belong to the individual.

Whether you are considering MAID or navigating a terminal diagnosis, you deserve comprehensive, compassionate care at life’s most sacred threshold.

SIGNS OF LOVE AND HONORING LIFE. (Amidst it all)1. Adorning2. The sun3. I said what I said! 4. Saying goodbye, preparing...
02/14/2026

SIGNS OF LOVE AND HONORING LIFE. (Amidst it all)
1. Adorning
2. The sun
3. I said what I said!
4. Saying goodbye, preparing to shroud. Honoring a fearless and joyful life!
5. Thanks Dorothy
6. Locking in this feeling to every cell of my body
7. The ancient ritual of bathing before shrouding
8. Love in gestation
9. A bow to Renee Good by incredible
10. Vigil
11. Thank you to all my teachers
12. Honoring the life of a magician
13. Songs from memory care
14. Post work hug from the ground, thank you Earth!
15. Spoiler alert: You’re a doula now, too.
16. The loves of my life!
27. Listen to little girls/women/femmes!

Photos taken with permission

01/25/2026

Tonight I’m lighting a candle for Alex Pretti, and all the soul’s transitioning so suddenly and violently after being murdered by ICE.

Tibetan Buddhists light a candle for 49 days after death, with the intention of guiding the spirit as they navigate stages of the bardos (stages of realms /afterlife) before rebirth. I believe this is especially important when death is sudden or violent.

Im lighting this candle in the hopes that this light supports their transition in whatever way possible. I pray they feel the love that they carried in their lives surrounding them as they travel. The gratitude that we are carrying amidst our broken hearts. I’m so sorry they never got to say goodbye or prepare for death. May their memory be a blessing. May their transition be as easeful as possible. May there be justice for his life, for all their lives.

We’re all death doulas now. Not just in community as we honor each other’s lives, but as a practice. Doulaing a transition of a culture, a conditioning, that has been guided by fear and othering, by power. Supporting/being steadfast with this transition through compassionate action and love. We have got to say goodbye to systems that have caused so much violence, so much harm and so much suffering.

Let their memories fuel us to have the courage to say goodbye to what is no longer serving this planet. Let their memories remind us that we can build and birth new ways of being.

Solidarity with Minneapolis. Stand strong. We are all so inspired by your loving action.

12/21/2025

Leaning into the darkness, the deepening, the sleepiness of this cycle.

I always find this time asks me to reflect on my losses and ask myself what still needs a goodbye? What are you sitting with as the days darken? What still needs to be seen, held, or spoken to?

Light your candles, have your fires, feel the darkness and make it quiet. Say your goodbyes, speak them to the darkness. Wishing everyone a restful solstice. 🕯️

Grateful to the elders and wisdom keepers such as
for their insight on this time and our cycles.

12/05/2025

HOARDER/ARCHIVIST/SHRINE-MAKER/DEATH WORKER/ LEGACY DREAMER AGOSTO MACHADO. 🙌🏻❤️‍🔥

Repost from
•
Step inside artist Agosto Machado’s living archive of q***r New York City luminaries.

From the counterculture of the 1960s to today, Machado has carried the legacies of New Yorkers, gathering newspaper clippings, photographs, posters and ashes in shopping bags of saved history. From these, he memorializes friends and icons like Candy Darling, Jack Smith, Ellen Stewart, Sylvia Rivera, and Marsha P. Johnson, community members lost too soon. His work is a tribute to community, chosen family, and the afterlife of art.

📺 Watch the full documentary at the link in bio.

is MoMA’s proud partner of

Join me Tuesday Dec. 16th, at 7PM EST, online, to learn about how a doula can support you and your family as you navigat...
12/02/2025

Join me Tuesday Dec. 16th, at 7PM EST, online, to learn about how a doula can support you and your family as you navigate terminal illness and end-of-life care.

This is an information and Q&A session to have more clarity around the role of a doula and learn about what services I offer. If you’re considering care for yourself or a family member, or are just curious, please join me! I’ll be sharing and speaking from my experience, my approach and my practice working both in Canada and New York State.

I’d love to spend most of the time answering any questions you have about the role and how it can be of support and service to you and your community.

This is not an information session for people considering becoming an end of life doula.

We’ll meet on zoom. It’s free. Bring your mom! Bring your kid! Or just come solo with your questions. Please share with those who may benefit or are considering more support. Looking forward to connecting!

Register in bio.

12/01/2025

This is why I do this work. When I feel like I’m in service to folks, when I’m witnessing their lives, when I’m just being present with all that is, it feels like praying.

When I was a kid I used to think about how I would ever be able to honor the lives of the people I loved most. My love for them felt too big, like they would never know how much they meant to me. I’d visualize my grandparents and parents and aunts and uncles funerals because at that time, I felt like it would come down to just one moment. How would I honor them? How would I show them that I’ve seen all that they offered this existence? What songs would I play to mourn and grieve them and connect with their spirit?

But I’m grown (ish) now, and my desire to honor life has expanded beyond my immediate family, and I know now that the honoring is way more than one event. I want every sentient being to be honored, and we do this by caring for life. Witnessing life. And this is why the injustices of these times, seeing sacred life disregarded, eviscerated…it boils my blood. Justice work is death work because no one deserves to die by violence or oppressive systems. Everyone deserves to be prayed for.

Caregiving is sacred work. It’s straight up holy. My mother taught me this. I can barely talk about it in this stupid app cus it can never do it justice. It’s not a product, it’s working with the divine. And EVERYONE deserves it.

10/30/2025

So grateful to for sharing stories of his friendship in life and in death with D’Angelo.
moving to hear his perception of time, how the two had evolved in life and music, and the seen and unseen, spoken and unspoken aspects to their time together until the end of D’Angelo’s life. Particularly moved by his depiction of the stories he had in his head about possible judgements the two may have carried about each other, all of it drifting away in the weeks towards his death, opening a new realm for the two of them to connect, weeks Amir calls the “greatest of their friendship.”

Lots to learn about the dying process from this account - from environment to “awkward feeling,” and how we can show up for it all. I’m grateful to him for sharing.

This is an audio version of his article in .

***
Repost:
(2 of 2) the conclusion of my reading of The Burial Of Black Genius…..Aka D’angelo Lives

writing is a cathartic exercise for me so apologies for a half hour posting ——

The article is up at

Thank you all for listening
thank you

TORONTO! I’m passing through town and so grateful that .to has offered to host this meditation and workshop. Join me as ...
10/15/2025

TORONTO!
I’m passing through town and so grateful that .to has offered to host this meditation and workshop.

Join me as we explore our aliveness through the lens of the erotic, the sacred and the impermanent.

Through the process of letting go, we explore what it means to truly live. By touching our mortality, spending time with our impermanent nature, we become more intimately aware of what brings us pleasure, joy and meaning.

This offering is grounded in Buddhist death practices (maranasati, or mindfulness of death) and the revolutionary teachings of Audrey Lorde, who reminds us of the erotic - not just as sexual, but as a deep well of feeling, joy, and aliveness.

Nov. 2, 7:30-9:30pm. Link in bio for tickets.

When I move inside, when I let go of all the stories, my “identity,” the who and what “I” am, when I dissolve my body, w...
09/25/2025

When I move inside, when I let go of all the stories, my “identity,” the who and what “I” am, when I dissolve my body, when I say, thank you, and then, goodbye, laying myself to rest in the depth of the earth, being held by the soil and wisdom of my impermanent nature - I feel a bright and effervescent light emerge. A twinkling of something else, something beyond words or understanding from the rational mind. It’s energy. Its love.

This is my experience of death meditations - a powerful guided visualization. When we move towards the fear and grief, our love can emerge as crystal - clear af.

Impermanence is our life long practice. Death isn’t here to be mastered, perfected or overcome. It’s to be in relationship with. It is to be felt. And by feeling it, we experience our erotic nature opening with potential.

Audre Lorde teaches, “This is one reason why the erotic is so feared, and so often relegated to the bedroom alone, when it is recognized at all. For once we begin to deeply feel all the aspects of our lives, we begin to demand from ourselves and from our life-pursuits that they feel in accordance with that joy which we know ourselves to be capable of. Our erotic knowledge empowers us, becomes a lens through which we scrutinize all aspects of our existence, forcing us to evaluate those aspects honestly in terms of their relative meaning within our lives. And this is a grave responsibility, projected from within each of us, not to settle for the convenient, the shoddy, the conventionally expected, nor the merely safe.”

Join me for a death meditation and guided visualization, with support from the teachings of Audre Lorde. Touching on our mortality is a gift, not just for us, but for the collective. Capitalist/patriarchal systems thrive through our disconnection to life. In reminding ourselves of the preciousness of our aliveness we are also connected with the preciousness and aliveness of others.

I’m so excited and proud to share this offering. Please join me! Link in bio to register.

When I move inside, when I let go of all the stories, my “identity,” the who and what “I” am, when I dissolve my body, w...
09/25/2025

When I move inside, when I let go of all the stories, my “identity,” the who and what “I” am, when I dissolve my body, when I say, thank you, and then, goodbye, laying myself to rest in the depth of the earth, being held by the soil and wisdom of my impermanent nature - I feel a bright and effervescent light emerge. A twinkling of something else, something beyond words or understanding from the rational mind. It’s energy. Its love.

This is my experience of death meditations - a powerful guided visualization. When we move towards the fear and grief, our love can emerge as crystal - clear af.

Impermanence is our life long practice. Death isn’t here to be mastered, perfected or overcome. It’s to be in relationship with. It is to be felt. And by feeling it, we experience our erotic nature opening with potential.

Audre Lorde teaches, “This is one reason why the erotic is so feared, and so often relegated to the bedroom alone, when it is recognized at all. For once we begin to deeply feel all the aspects of our lives, we begin to demand from ourselves and from our life-pursuits that they feel in accordance with that joy which we know ourselves to be capable of. Our erotic knowledge empowers us, becomes a lens through which we scrutinize all aspects of our existence, forcing us to evaluate those aspects honestly in terms of their relative meaning within our lives. And this is a grave responsibility, projected from within each of us, not to settle for the convenient, the shoddy, the conventionally expected, nor the merely safe.”

Join me for a death meditation and guided visualization, with support from the teachings of Audre Lorde. Touching on our mortality is a gift, not just for us, but for the collective. Capitalist/patriarchal systems thrive through our disconnection to life. In reminding ourselves of the preciousness of our aliveness we are also connected with the preciousness and aliveness of others.

I’m so excited and proud to share this offering. Please join me! Link in bio to register.

I really needed this after becoming a parent, three years ago, and still do! A place to talk and share about the heighte...
08/25/2025

I really needed this after becoming a parent, three years ago, and still do! A place to talk and share about the heightened and intense experience of giving birth and becoming a parent, feeling more fragile and human than ever. The new fears and the magnified experience of living. The overwhelming love followed by some overwhelming moments of fear. The experience of birthing a human being and therefore also bringing death closer. Looking at the world with an intensified reality of my own death and even theirs.

If you’re a “new” (when does parenting stop feeling new?!) or expecting parent or a someone who experiences their mortality in a different way since becoming a parent a while ago, please join me for this Death Cafe. In person, September 4th, at 7pm, Brooklyn Arts Exchange.

Register for free at the link in bio. ❤️‍🔥🌊❤️‍🔥

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421 5th Ave
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