The SurviveHer

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The SurviveHer We are a safe space for young survivors to seek advice, share their experiences, find strength and reclaim their voice.

If you have experienced trauma whether emotional, physical or sexual please join us and many others on our journey to freedom 🌼

28/08/2026

It is not uncommon for your perpetrator to spin the narrative and paint you in a bad light. It’s very important you let them. Don’t lose yourself trying to prove to others who you are. Allow people to misunderstand you and fight to understand yourself.
Of course you’re a bishhh in his story. You
stood up and made him take accountability for his own actions. He thought he’d get away with mistreating you and/or other women as our Silence can be their strength. Stay true to yourself and don’t let the world tell you who you are
PS abusers manipulate people to make themselves the victim in chaos they

Healing doesn’t mean forgetting what happened, it means learning to not let it define you. You are so much more than you...
15/08/2026

Healing doesn’t mean forgetting what happened, it means learning to not let it define you. You are so much more than your trauma and you deserve happiness even if you’re unsure what that looks like right now. 🌻

The question of “what if I never get justice?” Is something I asked myself for years and at times, I still do. But no matter what a system says or what anyone says about you, you deserve the opportunity to rediscover yourself and pour love inwardly the process.

This isn’t your burden to carry forever.

The beauty of life is you can always start again, even if that’s through small steps to regain control of your life such as a new hairstyle, a change of wardrobe, a new job, or bigger steps like going back to education, moving home or city and starting from scratch.

There is no right or wrong way to reclaim your life. Justice can be whatever it needs to be for you, because sometimes the best justice we can give ourselves is healing and choosing to grow despite the pain and fear.

You decide where life goes next.

Regardless of the outcome in court, you are worthy of a beautiful life. Do not give up until your dreams are your reality 🌻💛

Trigger warning - Slides contain emotional impact of sexual assault.This is a more personal post for me but I felt it wa...
06/06/2026

Trigger warning - Slides contain emotional impact of sexual assault.

This is a more personal post for me but I felt it was important to share. I have been reflecting on my journey and as I speak with more and more of you it saddens my heart to see so many young girls who are in my 16 year old shoes.

During my early days after the assault I was full of so much emotion. I still can’t fully pin point the feeling as it was a mix of many. However I recall spending hours researching and trying to understand what was happening to me or more so inside of me. I wanted to see what was “normal” and what wasn’t because I couldn’t recognise myself anymore nor understand what was happening in my body. There was very limited discussion around the aftermath or the impact (other than standard textbook which felt very brief and far from my reality) so I thought I’d take the time to speak a little on how it impacted (and still does) impact me as a survivor of sexual assault.

I noticed that when people talk about sexual assault the focus is often on the event and how traumatising it must have been or on what you were wearing, how you allowed it and legal processes. What wasn’t covered enough for me was the aftermath which to me was the scariest part. My body was not cooperating with me and yet tests were coming back state nothing was wrong. I’m not sure why the doctor didn’t link this to being a potential psychological response to my assault which I discovered years later.

It’s as though you wake up in the same skin as the night before, yet your entire brain, body and identity have shifted into someone or something you don’t recognise.

I didn’t just survive a traumatic night it created a new identity for me. The ripple effects of the aftermath continue for years afterwards and I still carry the pain til this day.
I just decided to no longer allow it to consume me.

If any of this resonates with you, I am deeply sorry. Your strength is admirable and the sky is your limit. You’ve already survived through the darkest times. It’s time to create some light ❤️

24/05/2026

Do whatever it takes to keep yourself alive. I don’t condone bad habits and I encourage you to reach out to services and get help but from my own experience I have enough awareness to understand at a certain time wait times were way too long and it was my less appealing habits that kept me alive. You must forgive yourself for who you were in your survival.
If you have to do any thing to stay alive
DO IT. We can forgive ourselves and build new habits later. If laying in bed keeps you alive, if gaming keeps you alive, if cooking keeps you alive and if doing nothing at all and being a massive man hater keeps you alive DO IT. We can grow as we heal, the main thing is finding a reason to keep going. I’d rather sit and listen to your bad decisions than sit and listen to your Eulogy and I’m sure your family feel the same

18/05/2026

I trusted a boy at 16 and at 22 I’m still living with the aftermath.

People think trauma ends when the incident ends.
(I wish) but sadly it doesn’t… it begins in the silence.

It then slowly creeps in and starts to lives in your nervous system.
In your daily routines.
In the way you move through the world and view others
In the plans you make to escape in spaces you once felt safe

The flinching at loud sounds or fast movement.
Checking over your shoulder because the last time you let your guard down or trusted someone you were assaulted.

We are responding normally to abnormal events, and I wish that was respected more.

Healing isn’t just therapy, podcasts and inspirational quotes.
Sometimes it looks like ice water on your face at 7am or checking exits so you know you can escape.
Sometimes it looks like staying home because your body says it isn’t safe and you need to regulate and sometimes it’s going out in nature to ground yourself.

For me it often looks like protecting the women who come after me (and before me), hoping they don’t suffer the way I had to.

If this resonates with you, you’re not broken, you’re hurt.
Your nervous system is trying to protect you. That is your body pouring love into you!

You deserve peace, healing and safety. 🤍

17/05/2026

What if I told you to believe in yourself especially on the days you forget why you started. You are becoming who you were meant to be so don’t keep focusing so much on who you were.

As survivors I truly believe we all have a phase of survival. Forgive yourself for that version of yourself and don’t let others label you.

People may say you can’t do this or can’t do that. What they mean is “if I was you I’d never be able to bounce back from that” You are capable of an amazing life and the only person who can impact that is you! Take control back and prove those around you wrong.

You’re stronger than you could ever imagine and you survived 100% of your trauma and bad days! Give yourself grace and keep walking. even if the first goal is to get up, make some toast, change your pjs and get back to bed. It’s still a step towards becoming who you were born to be before trauma joined the chat ❤️ heali

28/03/2026

An abuser will likely try to paint you out as the bad person in the scenario. It is easier said then done but try not to fixate on their canvas. Your truth is your art and baby the truth is a masterpiece. No matter how much someone tries to alter it you just can not replace it.
Another persons story does not define your truth and anyone who does not believe or honour your truth does not deserve space in your life.
Let them go. Let it go. Validate yourself and keep succeeding. Grow into a version of you they have no choice but to respect.

11/01/2026

Last month I had the privilege of being in a room full of amazing, ambitious, individuals. All unique, yet aligned by a shared passion for transforming lives and creating change. Spaces like these make me remember exactly why I started.

The evening’s topic was “What I stand for”, and for me that will always be empowerment.
It’s one word with massive impact. Whether it be through creativity, meaningful conversations, or fitness I believe that reclaiming control of your body and mind is one of the greatest gifts we can ever gift ourselves and each other.

I’m also so grateful to have accompanied Alice Watson as we announced that CHISPA has officially signed the I Can Youth Charter. This makes me so proud as it’s such a powerful step forward in supporting young people to thrive.

Thank you to everyone involved for creating such an inspiring evening. It was my pleasure and I can’t wait for future events.

From one survivor to another Merry Christmas. This time of year can stir up a lot of emotions for survivor’sAt times it...
25/12/2025

From one survivor to another Merry Christmas.

This time of year can stir up a lot of emotions for survivor’s
At times it feels heavy, lonely, and quiet. You are not broken you are human and you are healing.
It’s cliche how the whole world is extra lit during this period yet for some of us it can be the darkest time of year. Take the time you need to take care of YOU as we celebrate today.

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